“He wasn’t a good father, but she’s working to build a relationship with him.” – Ed Roberts

Over Head

The first time I noticed Ed was when I was attempting to stuff my suit case in the overhead storage compartment above my seat.  He was snickering as he watched me try to fit a fifty-pound case in a spot made to fit twenty-five-pound bags.  His eyes were sparkling with glee.  I didn’t blame him!

I’ve had the same thoughts many times as I’ve watched others attempting to complete the same impossible task on an aircraft.  Yet, this time it wasn’t impossible.  I got it in there!

“We’ll see if I can get it out of there!”  I said to myself as I took my seat on the flight to Tulsa.

Of course, Ed was on the same flight.  And, he was also on the same row.  He sat next to me in the window seat.  It was that little, laughing-eye-connection a few moments earlier that had broken a common, usual barrier between strangers on an airplane.  We began to talk before the door was shut and the plane was pushed from the gate.

“Are you headed home?”  I inquired.

“No.”  He said.  “My father-in-law lives outside of Tulsa in a remote area.  He recently had a stroke and can’t take care of himself anymore so I’m on my way to begin to help him pack for his move to an assisted care facility in Salt Lake City.”

He went on to explain that this move was difficult as his father-in-law lived in a remote area, because he didn’t like people.  And, he had never been a good father to his wife.

“He wasn’t a good father, but she’s working to build a relationship with him.” He explained.

He continued his story by saying, that there was a lot of tension in the relationship between his wife and her father.  Yet, she and Ed were doing the hard thing.  The thing that was fulfilling his wife’s heart-felt desire to establish and maintain a loving relationship with her father.  Ed went on to say that his wife had learned how to have bad familial relationships from her father and that had allowed her to first, develop a strong desire to build a happy, loving family.  Second, she was determined to use this experience-based-knowledge and desire to offer pure daughterly-love to her father throughout his remaining days.

“It is a case of heart over head.”  Ed said to me with a twinkle in his eye as he lifted his gaze to the overhead compartment above us to make sure I understood his dual meaning.

The first time I noticed Ed was when I was attempting to stuff my suit case in the overhead storage compartment above my seat.  He was snickering as he watched me try to fit a fifty-pound case in a spot made to fit twenty-five-pound bags.  His eyes were sparkling with glee.  I didn’t blame him!

I’ve had the same thoughts many times as I’ve watched others attempting to complete the same, silly, impossible task.  Yet, this time it wasn’t impossible.  I got it in there.  Now the plane had landed and I got up with trepidation.

“Good luck getting that out of there!”  Ed laughed.

“Thanks!”  I responded as I wrestled my bag out of the compartment.

I got it free, after an intense battle, and began to wheel it down the aisle, feeling good that I had accomplished the impossible, and knowing that Ed and his wife would also be successful in accomplishing their seemingly impossible mission.  

Because, they had allowed their hearts to reign supreme, ignoring conventional reasoning; living heart-over-head, they too would overcome the impossible.