Passing the Torch

"My Mother"

Passing the Torch

I watched as my sister walked slowly through the grass in my back yard. It wasn't that she couldn't walk faster; she could. She just couldn't walk faster and still allow my mother to cling to her arm. My mother was clinging to my sister's arm with one hand and she grasp her cane in the hand connected to her other arm. They walked slowly but surely until they reached the two small steps leading to the top of my deck.

The deck never seemed to be much of an obstacle before now. But, here is was and it loomed large. They stopped just before the first step and made preparations to begin the climb. First, one step was conquered and then the other. I felt a great relief as they reached the top.

Reaching the top has a new meaning for me these days. It can mean lots of different things; the top of stairs, the top of a mountain, the top of life. The top of life can be reached at any age; I'm just watching my mother reach it after many years. I guess I define "the top" as the point just before a human's life journey ends.

My mother is now in her eighties. For all I know, she will live another forty years! For all I know she may be ready to pass the torch to me and my brothers and sisters all too soon. So, I've been watching and closely observing this part of her journey. I'm feeling a sense of responsibility begin to settle upon my shoulders.

It's a sense of responsibility I've never felt before. I do have comfort that millions of others have been through the same thing over and over again. But, that doesn't make this experience any less new to me. I have lots of questions!

On this day, one question seemed to be swarming around me in the form of children, "How do I make sure all the great things she's taught me are passed on to the next generation so people, who have and will come, through our family line will know them?"

As I stood in the doorway to my house watching my mother and sister continue their walk into the cool interior of my home there must have been at least ten screaming, laughing kids run past. They were her great grand children. They were seemingly oblivious to the momentous journey their Grandma-Great was in the process of completing. That's ok. That's the way it is as you begin a journey. That's why they're here.

Events like this, the annual "Butterfield Bash at Buffalo Gal Ranch" are important stops along the way. It's a chance for those beginning their journey to gather with other life journey traveling companions. It gives all of us time to visually see, physically touch, and spiritually feel the others we have a connection with. After all, there's nothing like seeing something first hand is there? Seeing things first hand, in person makes it real. That's how we all see that no one and nothing can ever replace my mother, my children's grandmother, and my children's, children's Grandma-Great.

In today's American society we don't have much of a clue about this concept. We seem to live in an "easy come, easy go" world. Wives and husbands, brothers and sisters, friends and jobs are all touted as interchangeable.

The reality is much different. Everyone we meet in life is irreplaceable! Each person has something unique to teach us. Each person touches us in a way no other person can. It doesn't matter if our encounter is long or brief; there is uniqueness in each and every relationship.

That's the torch I want to pass to my children. I want them to be able to spend as much time as possible with their grandmother so they can begin to see the truth. I want them to see that she has had impact on their lives in a way that no other person can or will. I want them to know deep within their hearts that she is an irreplaceable part of them. I want them to see her with their eyes, touch her with their hands and feel her with their spirit so they will know who she was and what she has done for them.

As your friend, I want the same for you. Take some time today and think of your parents and grandparents. Think about all you've learned from them. Feel the depth of the relationship. Know that you'll be passing their torch to the coming generations. Have you begun the process?

Creating Breakthroughs in Your Life

Creating Breakthroughs in Your Life

"Continued learning is the most important predictor of success."

• Brett Pinegar
  

 

Have you ever felt a desire to change but haven't been able to? If you have, then you're just like the vast majority of us. I can see a lot of areas I'd like to change in my life so I've been searching for ways to make a "breakthrough."

So, when I had the chance to sit and talk with Brett Pinegar, the author of "The Breakthrough Company" I was in hopes I could use some of the principles he's discovered on a personal level. I couldn't have arranged for this meeting alone so I give my thanks to Wayne Brown Institute and Mountain West Capital Network for opening the way for me.

Fall has always seemed to be a time of new openings, new beginnings. Perhaps it's because it signals the opening of a new school year, a new football season and training camp for basketball. The leaves begin to change because the nights become cooler. Everything seems to be changing and I always feel a sense of anticipation.

The anticipation I feel is decidedly different from the dread my fourteen year old daughter feels as she begins another school year. It isn't that she doesn't like to learn. Far from it; she reads far more than most people I know. As I look at her I realize that at an early age she's discovered what Brett Pinegar calls "The most important predictor of success."

Continual learning or being a life-long learner is essential for success. That makes sense when you look at the pace of change in today's society. I've had to continually make changes in the way I think and work, just to keep up!

If there's one certainty in life, it's change. Life seems to be designed that way. Still, knowing that doesn't make changes easy. This was made clear to me when visiting with my friend Ed Dalton.

We were talking about the challenges his daughter is facing. She's a bright young woman who had a successful medical practice. One day as she descended the stairs at her home, arms full of stuff, she tripped and fell. The fall broke her ankle in a horrific way and it's led to a cascade of other medical issues that have left her clinging to life on several occasions.

As I sat face to face with Ed talking about their challenges, one important question came to my mind. So, I asked it, "What can you learn from this?"

Ed took the note book he always carries in his pocket and wrote the question down. He could instantly see the importance of this small question. It's a question that's important for each of us to ask on a daily basis. Make sure you ask it to yourself every day!

Asking, "What can I learn" will cause you to become what Brett Pinegar calls, "an advocate for change." It means you'll enable yourself to look at the world from different views. You'll become adaptable; being able to change more quickly. This change will create what psychologists call "the cycle of positives" in your life. Positive lifestyles always attract more positive lifestyles, and that's when your life will really begin to grow and change for the better. Larry Glenn says, "Because you possess the experience and knowledge, you can begin helping others improve their lives as well."

New people will begin to associate with you as they're drawn into your cycle of positive experience and knowledge. They'll be important to you because they'll help you discover new truths and enable you to surround yourself with a group of "Sages" or Mentors. Associate with others who will tell you the truth so your cycle of positives will keep growing and your new life and joyful lifestyle will keep creating, accomplishing, and attracting the new life you've always desired.

Begin to create your cycle of positives today by becoming a continual learner, asking what you can learn from your experiences, adapting to change as quickly as possible, looking at different points of view, advocating change, associating with others who will tell you the truth, and surrounding yourself with a group of Sages. If you will, you'll begin to create breakthroughs in your life!

The Great Life Changer

"I just don't know why I have been feeling so uncertain, so upset inside."

• Kim Fish
  

The Great Life Changer

I walked into my office and saw Kim sitting at her desk so I stuck my head through the doorway to say hello. As I did so my thoughts were immediately shuttled around to the significant events of her recent past.

Kim has a father and a step father. She's very close to both of them. That's why her experience of having them both pass away this year has been so difficult. She and her mother just returned from laying both men to rest within the past two months. Kim's view of the world is forever changed.

Even though her view has changed, I watched her get back on her feet and find her center once again. Her smile returned and it was great to see her laugh again. Then, two weeks ago the hand of providence reached her way again.

I remember seeing her in flight as she rushed toward the elevator bank to flee. In moments she had disappeared behind stainless steel doors. It was clear to me that something was wrong so I asked a colleague what had happened.

"Her niece was just killed in a traffic accident," she said.

My heart sank.

"She's on her way to Seattle with her mother so they can attend the funeral."

I remember thinking, "Hasn't Kim had enough?"

She was back now. So was my mind.

I finished my hello and walked through the door. The feeling in the room was somber. I didn't know what to say except for a careful, "How are you?" It was the kind of "how are you?" that meant, how are you dealing with the loss of your loved ones.

Kim looked up at me and said, "I just don't know why I'm feeling so uncertain, so upset inside."

I knew why. "It isn't easy to lose one loved one in the recent past, much less three!" I replied.

We sat and talked for a few minutes. I mostly listened. I didn't know what to say for the longest time. After all, how could someone as inexperienced and weak as me fill the huge void created by death?

Then my mind caught hold upon the "great life changer."

I have a small piece of blue paper on my desk. It's the size of a business card. I got it from my uncle Truss a few years ago. He gave it to me at a family wedding just after his wife had passed away.

I'll never forget his small, aged, trembling hands reaching into his wallet as we talked. "I want you to have this," he said. I looked down at it. The words were written in black and filled the small paper. "Keep an attitude of gratitude."

"Keep this with you," my uncle said. "It will keep your heart full of joy even in the most difficult of times." Then he gave me a hug and went off to talk to other family members with a spring in his step.

My Uncle Truss knows what he's talking about. He's buried two wives and has raised a wonderful family over a long life. And, he's done it with a never failing twinkle in his eyes!

Suddenly a twinkle came back to my eyes as I was able to pass this wisdom on to my friend Kim. We talked about gratitude and everything she has in her life. You know, it wasn't too long before Kim was laughing. Gratefully, she had found her smile again!

Everyone will have times in their life when they're really challenged so I'm sure you will too. When that happens in your life, I hope you'll remember this story of an aged man; the story of a man who has lived his life well. Remember the never failing twinkle in his eyes. Watch him pull the little blue paper from his wallet. Receive the paper in your hand and read it. "Keep an attitude of gratitude."

Let gratitude fill your heart and in the end, you'll always have a twinkle in your eyes too!

 

Do What You Really Want to do!

"Think About What you Really Want to do?"

- Paul Gahlinger

Do What You Really Want to do!

I've been spending the last few weeks working with Dr. Paul Gahlinger and his company MediCruiser. It's been a great learning experience for me. You see, Dr. Gahlinger is what I would call "The Father of Modern Telemedicine."

Do you remember old movies where Doctors would come to a patient's house and treat them in their home? Well, that's exactly what MediCruiser does; sort of. Dr. Gahlinger has outfitted a PT Cruiser with two Nurses and modules of medical equipment. The Nurses drive the Cruiser to provide care to patients and they use a computer to bring Dr. Paul, as he is called, along with them.

When the Nurses get to the patient's home they set up the computer and then "teleconference" Dr. Paul with the patient. So, the patient gets personal care from two compassionate Nurses in person and the full attention of a physician for live consultation all at the same time for less cost than a visit to a clinic! The patient doesn't get exposed to other people with illness, doesn't have to go to the hassle and expense of travel, and perhaps best of all doesn't ever have to sit in a waiting room. It's a great advancement in medical care.

You know I am always looking for ways to advance my own life so when I get a chance to sit and talk with someone who has cultivated a talent for innovation I always take it. We had just finished a meeting with other people on our Mentoring Team. The conference room had cleared out, the office was empty and Dr. Paul and I were just talking. We spent about an hour in dialogue where I was able to catch a glimpse of how a luminary thinks. I really didn't know what to expect but whatever my expectations may have been, they were not even close to what I learned in reality.

We talked about what he's been doing over the last few years. I found that he's written eleven text books, helped develop the telemedicine program for the U.S. Army and NASA, created a training college to give a better education for Nurses, worked in several countries as a telemedicine consultant and has started MediCruiser as a vehicle to revolutionize medical care in the United States. Talk about a world changer!

What I was hoping to discover during our conversation was some bit of information that would help you and me transform our lives; something we could hold on to. I wanted to make sure I could mine just one nugget of knowledge that could act as a catalyst to a better way of life. And, I found it!

Dr. Paul said, "Don't think about what you can do. Think about what you really want to do!" He went on to say, "This isn't much. But, it's what people should do. Most people set their sights too low."

I've been able to spend the last few days pondering this conversation and what it could mean to you and me and I've developed some steps you may want to consider.

First, look out in the world and see something you want to change. I call this step, "finding your life's mission." At first glance this may seem a little silly. I mean, what can an everyday common person like me do to change the world? Really?

The key here is to follow Dr. Paul's advice exactly. What do you REALLY want to do? If you don't really, really want to do it, you'll never have the fire in your belly to accomplish it!

Second, focus on developing the skills to make your mission a success. If you never learn to fly or about aviation engineering, you'll never be able to create the next generation of aircraft, if that's your mission.

Third, make sure you talk to everyone you meet about your mission. You'll never know who may want to be involved with you. There may be lots of others who would like to walk with you down your path. Remember when I said I was meeting with Dr. Paul and our Mentoring Team? Now we have a few really good minds working together to help change the way medical care is delivered in the United States. Let other people help you to see what you can't or wouldn't see without their help.

Fourth, know that there are people all around the world who share your vision. Dr. Paul is headed to Mongolia in the next few weeks where he'll be using and teaching what he knows to likeminded people. That sounds awfully one sided. The truth is that he'll learn as much from them as they'll learn from him if he just opens his eyes, heart and mind.

Fifth, recognize that your mission is a lifelong pursuit. It won't happen over night. Dr. Paul once said, "I just want to get moving on this!" As you can see, he is moving; just not as fast as he had hoped, or would like to. It will be the same for you and me. Count on it!

Finally, enjoy your journey. Savor every moment of your life. Enjoy each small victory. Love the people you work with and meet along the way. After all, that's what your life really is, a wonderful journey.

The Ripple Effect

"It ripples everywhere."

• Marianne Heder
  

The Ripple Effect

It was a small airplane filled with all sorts of people. I looked around me and studied the others on this flight. When I say others I mean more than people. One woman sat with a large woven cage on her lap.

The cage contained a couple of chickens and a little straw. They were surprisingly quiet as we bumped along in the sky. I would have thought they would be more nervous. More like me.

I had been traveling for almost twenty-three hours to get to this point of my journey. I was tired and hungry. I was also without luggage.

By the time I had touched down in Central America my luggage had touched down, well who knows? All I had now was what I was wearing. That was it! The baggage service told me they would forward my things on to me. I knew this was a long shot because I was heading to a small island off the coast of Honduras. And, this plane I was on kept jolting the truth; my luggage would never find me.

At this point I was hoping someone would be able to find me in one piece! The plane bounced up and down, side to side. Were it not for the seat belt there is no doubt I would be completely shaken, not stirred. I couldn't wait to get back on the ground.

Then I saw the ground! The runway on this island began and ended at the ocean. I saw waves crashing hard against the rocks as they protected the small strip of asphalt from erosion. We were heading in, just like the waves. We were up and down just like the waves!

As we got closer, to supposed salvation, I held my breath and hoped for a landing that would keep me living for at least another day. I watched out of my small window. Rocks! Strip. Rocks! Up and down we went. Then, one bounce, and STRIP!

There was a small puff of dust and we were on the wheels, slowing so we could come to a stop. Then the door opened and we all began to disembark. At the top of the stairs one of the first things I saw was a hand painted sign. It was on a weathered rectangular board. It read, "Utila International Airport."

I laughed as the words were imprinted on my mind. I looked out and saw a small dirt road and a line of people beginning to make their way toward town. This was unlike any "International Airport" I had ever seen. There were no cars. There were no taxis. There were no buses. There were only feet to carry us away to our destination.

Then, my mind carried me to another destination. Here I was sitting with friends talking some thirty-five years later. It was strange to be in other surroundings and to have scaled so many years in a flash. I had gone back to Utila because my friend Marianne had been talking about how relationships were what were really important and the other things were "just stuff."

I had a similar conversation with Tracy Zitting just one day before. "If our business were to fail, we would be alright as long as we're together" she said speaking of her family.

Utila was where I learned for the first time that all I really needed was what I was wearing along with a tooth brush. It was there when I learned a small shared room and a community kitchen could bring tremendous joy.

I watched the joy bounce out of Marianne's eyes as she taught me about the "Ripple Effect." The Ripple Effect becomes powerful when we serve other people and they can feel our love. "Our love is powerful enough to ripple through thousands of people and through time."

I knew instantly this was true because that very moment I was able to feel the love of people I had developed in a land so far away, such a long time ago. It was a reunion of experience that has never really left me. I just needed to be reminded.

Take a minute and make a plan to send ripples of love today. Look around you and see who you can help along their way. Then, help them with the only purpose of offering the love of your heart. If you will, you'll begin to see the ripples of your action immediately. As you do this time and time again there will be a time when you'll see more than ripples. You'll see waves of love and goodness all around you. Hope you enjoy the surf!