Take Ten Seconds to Prepare

"I didn't have any time. I didn't have ten seconds!"

• Ken Smith
  

A Ten Second Preparation

I called Ken to check in with him.

"Ken? This is Lynn. How are you today?"

It was a Monday morning and I had no reason to believe it was not just like every other Monday. But, Ken's answer was different than I expected.

"I'm not doing very well. My wife died yesterday."

The words felt like a slap across my face. I was stunned! I stammered for something to say.

"You're kidding me!" I replied.

As soon as the words left my mouth I felt silly for saying something that ridiculous. I wished I could take the words back! Happily, Ken just let the words drift past without feeling any sting. He simply began to tell me of the biggest life challenge he had ever faced.

I listened to the story and thought how strange it all was. I had been in the Smith home not more than two weeks before and everything was in good order. Ken and his wife were sitting in their living room. She was knitting while all three of us talked. It just didn't seem plausible for her to have passed away so quickly.

Ken explained the whole thing to me. They were in their home when she told him she didn't feel well and asked him to take her to the hospital. He did. They were in the emergency room and she appeared to be doing well. The doctors and nurses had been attending to her for a while and everything seemed to be going well. They determined that she had a bowel obstruction. It had been a long day of tests and evaluation.

With everything seemingly stable Ken decided to step out of the room for a minute to go get a hamburger. They hadn't eaten all day. He was gone for a mere ten minutes and he came back into the room with some food for the two of them and she was gone!

"It's got to be hard," I said. "You were married for fifty years weren't you?

"Yes," he replied.

"You didn't have any time to prepare!"

"No. I didn't have any time. I didn't have ten seconds!"

Since that Monday, I've been to the funeral and Ken and I have spent lots of time talking. I can still see the pain in his eyes. I can still see the hole in his life. No matter what happens in Ken's future that hole will always be there. At least it's a hole filled with wonderful memories of an amazing love. The love of his life; she meant everything to him!

This experience has meant everything to me as well. Through it I've had a confirmation that love really can last a lifetime and that we need to express it every day, every second! Sometimes we don't have even ten seconds to prepare. No, wait!

Ken didn't have ten seconds to prepare! He had fifty years to prepare! So it can be for all of us if we'll choose to share our love with those around us. Ken has shown us the way to fill any holes in our lives. Please take just ten seconds today to prepare and then go share your love with everyone around you.

More Than Just Mowing Weeds

"You didn't come here to cut weeds; you came to talk to me."

-Ed Dalton

More Than Just Mowing Weeds

On Memorial Day I got up and started my lawn mower. When I saw my friend Ed Dalton the day before, I was reminded that he could use some help in his yard. So this day was going to be a day of action, not just a day of remembrance.

I road my mower up the street, feeling the fresh air blowing across my face in anticipation of the work. Since it wasn't far, it wasn't long before I could begin to mow the weeds that were creating a fire hazard around the newly constructed home. And, as I worked, the dust soon began to swirl around me. The mower cut through the weeds with relative ease and I settled back to finish the work.

In a few minutes I spied Ed walking through the dust on his way toward me. We talked for a moment and then he began to clear rocks that were hidden in the dust and vegetation. Our work moved forward more quickly and in no time at all we were finished; and the house was much safer from a potential fire.

We were covered in dust and our throats were dry so Ed invited me to sit for a while with a cold drink. It was a chance for us to enjoy each other's company. We began to talk.

We talked and discussed lots of things. We talked about our families and some of the challenges we face. We talked about business and how our lives were being affected from the economic shifts that are occurring all around us. It was great to sit and just talk. As our conversation began to ebb, Ed made a most astute statement.

"You didn't come here to cut weeds; you came to talk to me."

I listened to his words, but more importantly, I felt his words in my heart. I knew he was right. As a result of our conversation and work together we no longer felt separate or alone. We were able to share our fears and our hopes. We renewed our friendship with the confirmation of common hopes, dreams and challenges. I was glad I came to talk with Ed.

I could have spent the day just cutting weeds. I'm glad I didn't. Had I stayed home I would have just done yard work. But, when I went to cut weeds with Ed I got a lot more. I got a renewal of spirit I could get in no other way.

Make time to help friends on a regular basis so you'll be doing more than just completing tasks and living alone. You'll be building relationships that will renew your friendship and spirit. If you will, you and your friends will enjoy greater strength and courage to face whatever life brings your way.

Bravery in a Small Package

"I just do all I can and that's all I can do."

• Joy Haver
  

Bravery in a Small Package

I didn't intend to learn one of the great lessons of my life in that moment. And, I didn't intend to watch a person of such small stature grow into the largest, bravest person I've ever witnessed right before my eyes. But, it all happened in a moment as I made a brief, albeit important stop as I walked down the hall from my office.

Near the entrance to my office is a countertop that extends up to about four feet in height and behind this sits a small, quiet woman of great stature. There are times when walking past doesn't yield a view of her, except for the top of her head as she sits using the computer to do her work. Yet, on this day my view was changed by a simple encounter.

I stopped because it appeared to me as if an uncharacteristic burden seemed to be expressed across her brow. For this is a brow, usually alight with a twinkle nestled in the eyes just below. So much so that I have often marveled that such a countenance is the perfect match for her name, Joy. This day though, the twinkle had faded and the Joy I know was not the same. I was soon to learn why.

As I spoke with her I watched as she used all she had to keep back tears that were so ready to flow. There were only a few times when she had to push back the salty water with her fingers. My heart ached as I listened to her tell me of her challenges.

Her husband is fighting cancer and the chemotherapy is not going well. And, as if that's not enough she flew to Rhode Island last weekend to rescue he aged mother and bring her to the shelter of her own home. Yet, her she was, determined to be on the job each and every day so she could provide the much needed financial support necessary to sustain her family. She is engaged in a most noble cause indeed!

I walked down the hall in an effort to gain a little respite from the rigors of my own business and what I found was a changed perspective. I found that bravery can come in small packages and in seemingly small ways. I found that a giant can be seen amongst us, hidden in a small body. I found an example of goodness and grace that can scarcely be equaled.

Perhaps most importantly, I've learned that the greatest people are those living as part of our lives. They aren't the most famous and they aren't generally on television. They don't have throngs of people chanting their names in stadiums and they don't have photographers chasing them around. They're our friends and neighbors. They're the people we can buoy up with a listening ear and a helping hand. I encourage you to find the Joy in your life and help the brave become even braver and the giant in them stand a little taller.

Seeking Truth and Principle

"The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable"

• James Garfield
  

Seeking Truth and Principle

If you're like me you're striving to live your life based on principles. I've found that it's the best way to live and feel at peace inside. Still, being a seeker of truth and principle isn't always an easy path.

Last week I was attending a meeting where the speaker was trying to discuss a very delicate matter. I watched him as he carefully worked to navigate some "dangerous waters." In fact, his entire presentation was off the cuff until he got to one point where is stopped and said, "I want to say this correctly so I spent a lot of time to write it down so the words come out the way I want them to."

As he proceeded, it was clear that he had chosen his words very carefully. It was his objective to present a difficult subject in a way that would teach and reach as many people in the room as possible. I appreciated his extraordinary effort. Yet, his words were not satisfying to me.

As he went on with his talk, I found myself becoming more and more agitated inside. It became so disruptive to me that it wasn't too long before my ears were soon closed; any principles that may have been presented were being blocked.

You know that I always try to listen to learn so I found this internal response to be a foreign one and have been struggling with it for a week now. I still haven't been able to reconcile the words or the principles being presented, but I've made some progress since I heard a quote from James Garfield, 20^th President of the United States a few days ago.

"The truth will set you free, but first it will make you miserable."

This statement rang true to me, in my current state, so I wanted to learn a little more about this obscure President and found that an assassin's bullet cut his time in office to a mere 200 days. Mrs. Garfield was at his bed side as his doctor said, "Mrs. Garfield, the President is dying." Leaning over her husband and fervently kissing his brow, she exclaimed, "Oh! Why am I made to suffer this cruel wrong?"

Now that's a feeling everyone one of us has had at one time or another! And, I fear that such a feeling will cause many to shrink at the prospect of facing hard truths from time to time. But, shall we give up our quest to seek and live lives of principle simply because it's uncomfortable from time to time?

No! Perhaps the greatest principle we must live by is the most basic; it is to live by principle. But, sometimes it appears as if it's not only the road least traveled, it's also the road most difficult to travel. All I can tell you is that it may be the road least traveled and it may be the most difficult to travel, but it is the only satisfying road to travel in life. So, encourage yourself to stay on this road by surrounding yourself with others on the road of truth and principle. Learn from each other and even carry each other when necessary. It'll all be worth it. I promise!