“When I lost my husband I suddenly felt lost.” – Brenda Rouse

Restoring Balance

Brenda met me just outside her ticket office. I wasn’t expecting her to be watching, to be kind enough to come out to offer a greeting. Because she’s so welcoming it’s easy to become completely enthralled with this delightful person. And, I was about to learn that her personal story is just as captivating.

Brenda has been the Director of Excursions for the Arkansas & Missouri Railroad for just over thirty years. You’d never know it. Her energy and excitement are palpable, even after hosting more than fourteen thousand guests on her Holly Train with Santa since Thanksgiving. 

“When I lost my husband I suddenly felt lost,” she said before we sat on John Wayne’s former railcar and coasting comfortably in it, with Santa Clause, to complete our own Holly Train excursion.

“I thought I’d go back to my home state of Mississippi in an effort to become re-grounded,” she continued. “Then I got a call from the owner of the Arkansas & Missouri Railroad asking me if I’d be willing to come over to speak with her. I did. And now, it’s been just over thirty years. I’m still here and I still love it!”

The easy conclusion to reach from her description is that the job restored her balance. I’m sure it helped, but there is more to the story and Brenda’s noticeable charisma. After all, charisma is not so much an intrinsic personal gift, as it is a learnable skill having a lot to do with the ability to be fully engaged in each moment of your life. Taking a short excursion with Brenda is the express train to see how she restored her life-balance after being lost.

We’re all on the pajama train together. There is something about riding an historic railroad when everyone is dressed in their Christmas pajamas. It gives you the ability to see things from another person’s perspective, to understand how that person is feeling. And, Brenda is a master at showing: you can only be emphatic and place yourself in another person’s pajamas if you’re fully attentive to them.

Hear the “clickity clack” of the track. The ability to truly hear what someone is trying to communicate to you, both verbally and non-verbally is called listening attentively. Brenda carefully listens to the child within everyone, no matter their age.

The eyes have it. Eye contact is one of the most powerful forms of human connection. Brenda establishes such an impactful connection, allowing others to be heard and actually feel seen. Just ask the young conductor on her train and he’ll proudly tell you he’s been wearing his role and uniform as conductor over the last six years, since he was sixteen. He isn’t planning to ever leave.

Brenda isn’t planning to take an excursion elsewhere anytime soon either. And, anyone who rides her train is on the track of restoring their own balance. They receive Brenda’s three elements naturally, because they're given freely.

How’s your balance?