A Small Sliver of Time

“I finally had to do the hard thing and take away his keys.” – Sterling Wilson

A Small Sliver of Time

I didn’t know Sterling before he made a phone call to me.  The caller ID that popped up on my phone read “Santa Rosa.”  During the much earlier days of number revelation, with many fewer and “line-bound” area codes, one could reliably know the location of the caller.  Those days are long past as mobility has become the rule of the day.

So, I asked, once I found out his current location is Utah, “What brought you to Utah from Santa Rosa?”

With that question, a key was turned.

“I grew up here, but when my father became ill I knew it was time to leave California.”  He said.

“How is your father now?”  I asked.

“Well, there are days when he’s lucid, but he spends most of his days watching television now.  He’s very clear about the past.  He just isn’t able to be in the present much anymore.”  Sterling continued.

“Wow!”  I replied.  “You’re dealing with a lot.  I understand because I’ve been through the same thing with members of my own family.”

“Thank you for your empathy! He said, before telling me more. “It’s hardest on my mom.  She’s struggling to take care of him every day.”

That description turned a couple of more keys in my heart, as I remembered that same situation occurring in the lives of some of my own loved-ones.  In each personally known case such caregivers passed away before the person they were tending to. It’s hard to watch a healthy partner give their lives in the service of one they hold so dear.  Yet, they do so willingly, out of love.

“My wife and I recently had a son.  We named him after my father.  It was to show our love; and we wanted to make it easier for my Dad to be able to remember his grandson’s name.”  Sterling said just before he halted.  “I finally had to do the hard thing and take away his car keys.”

“I’ve had that conversation!  If you ever need to talk with someone who understands, please call me again.”  I proffered.

I didn’t know Sterling before he made a phone call to me.  The caller ID that popped up on my phone read “Santa Rosa.”  In the much earlier days of number revelation, with many fewer and “line-bound” area codes, one could reliably know the location of the caller.  Those days are long past as mobility has become the rule of the day.  Yet, one essential rule hasn’t changed at all.

The “Golden Rule” is still “Love your neighbor as yourself.”  

We have much more in common with each other than we have difference.  To turn the key of understanding all we need to do is talk to each other for just a small sliver of time.