Monday, June 30, 2025

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 6.30.2025

“What if I have regrets later?” – Gabe Chariton

Formative Importance

Gabe’s thinking wheels were turning. He had formulated a question about his financial future. That question was spinning in his mind. He was processing information over and over again. Yet, he was doing more than processing.

Processing could be a practice of rehashing the same old thoughts. That wasn’t what he was doing. He had considered his current position and was using it to gather additional intelligence. I knew he was assembling more data, because he asked me to give him some analysis. That’s why we were sitting together, talking through the facts, before hitting golf balls, on a bright Thursday afternoon, in a bay at the local Top Golf. 

That’s where I witnessed Gabe’s formative thinking progression.

This wasn't just a financial transaction for him; it was a deep breath at a pivotal crossroads. Gabe understood, with a quiet certainty, that this choice would be formative. It wasn't merely about the immediate cash or a perceived potential, distant windfall; it was about weaving the very fabric of his financial and core beliefs together, shaping his relationship with risk, and laying the groundwork for every significant money decision he’d make for years to come. Would he prioritize the comforting embrace and security of retiring all his current obligations, or the one who dared to dream of exponential growth, trusting in a possible long-game phantom? 

Gabe’s next question was, “What if I sell that property and its value increases tremendously over the next few years?” 

“May I make a suggestion?” I answered.

“Yes. Please,” Gabe responded.

“Will you please tell me what is most important to you right now?”

After thinking for a few moments Gabe said, "opportunity cost is not just in dollars, but in the precious currency of peace of mind. Being debt-free isn't just about the financial ledger; it will free up my mind. It will allow me to think clearer, to explore future ventures with a lighter heart, unburdened by the hovering hammer of debt. The potential future appreciation of the property, while a lovely thought, is really like a distant, shimmering star. I’ll think about it over the next couple of days and we’ll talk again.” 

Gabe’s thinking wheels still were turning. Yet, I had witnessed a shift in his thinking from unproductive rehashing to formative importance. He was now focused on the tangible, not on a nonexistent future.

“It’s critical to determine what is most important to you,” I said. “It will allow you to act now, without the worry of regret in the future. That’s why I call it formative importance. It confirms what you really want now, so you can build a path forward without remorse.”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

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