Passing the Torch

"My Mother"

Passing the Torch

I watched as my sister walked slowly through the grass in my back yard. It wasn't that she couldn't walk faster; she could. She just couldn't walk faster and still allow my mother to cling to her arm. My mother was clinging to my sister's arm with one hand and she grasp her cane in the hand connected to her other arm. They walked slowly but surely until they reached the two small steps leading to the top of my deck.

The deck never seemed to be much of an obstacle before now. But, here is was and it loomed large. They stopped just before the first step and made preparations to begin the climb. First, one step was conquered and then the other. I felt a great relief as they reached the top.

Reaching the top has a new meaning for me these days. It can mean lots of different things; the top of stairs, the top of a mountain, the top of life. The top of life can be reached at any age; I'm just watching my mother reach it after many years. I guess I define "the top" as the point just before a human's life journey ends.

My mother is now in her eighties. For all I know, she will live another forty years! For all I know she may be ready to pass the torch to me and my brothers and sisters all too soon. So, I've been watching and closely observing this part of her journey. I'm feeling a sense of responsibility begin to settle upon my shoulders.

It's a sense of responsibility I've never felt before. I do have comfort that millions of others have been through the same thing over and over again. But, that doesn't make this experience any less new to me. I have lots of questions!

On this day, one question seemed to be swarming around me in the form of children, "How do I make sure all the great things she's taught me are passed on to the next generation so people, who have and will come, through our family line will know them?"

As I stood in the doorway to my house watching my mother and sister continue their walk into the cool interior of my home there must have been at least ten screaming, laughing kids run past. They were her great grand children. They were seemingly oblivious to the momentous journey their Grandma-Great was in the process of completing. That's ok. That's the way it is as you begin a journey. That's why they're here.

Events like this, the annual "Butterfield Bash at Buffalo Gal Ranch" are important stops along the way. It's a chance for those beginning their journey to gather with other life journey traveling companions. It gives all of us time to visually see, physically touch, and spiritually feel the others we have a connection with. After all, there's nothing like seeing something first hand is there? Seeing things first hand, in person makes it real. That's how we all see that no one and nothing can ever replace my mother, my children's grandmother, and my children's, children's Grandma-Great.

In today's American society we don't have much of a clue about this concept. We seem to live in an "easy come, easy go" world. Wives and husbands, brothers and sisters, friends and jobs are all touted as interchangeable.

The reality is much different. Everyone we meet in life is irreplaceable! Each person has something unique to teach us. Each person touches us in a way no other person can. It doesn't matter if our encounter is long or brief; there is uniqueness in each and every relationship.

That's the torch I want to pass to my children. I want them to be able to spend as much time as possible with their grandmother so they can begin to see the truth. I want them to see that she has had impact on their lives in a way that no other person can or will. I want them to know deep within their hearts that she is an irreplaceable part of them. I want them to see her with their eyes, touch her with their hands and feel her with their spirit so they will know who she was and what she has done for them.

As your friend, I want the same for you. Take some time today and think of your parents and grandparents. Think about all you've learned from them. Feel the depth of the relationship. Know that you'll be passing their torch to the coming generations. Have you begun the process?