New Windows of Opportunity

“I don’t like to be defeated by anything!”

-Reed Orcutt

New Windows of Opportunity

There was a safety railing to be installed and a broken window to replace.  It all had to be completed on Monday morning so the repairs could be verified.  It was late Thursday afternoon and I was “dialing” like crazy to see if I could get someone or more than ones to commit to do the work.

Call after call dished out another defeat to me.  The deadline was so tight that I couldn’t get anyone to say they would do the work in less than a week.  I was getting desperate because I knew the deadline had no flexibility.  It was about as flexible as my own rigid body when compared to a yoga master.

I had to sleep on it for the night to see if my mind would produce the answer since it is by far the most flexible part of my being.  It paid off.

At about one a.m. my eyes popped open and I audibly said, “I can’t believe I didn’t think of him!”  I was much calmer and knew deep inside that this was the solution to my problem.  I don’t know how I knew.  I just knew!  Still, the rest of the night didn’t yield much sleep because I watched the clock’s red LED numbers flash past the minutes until 7:30 am; a time I knew would be alright for me to call my friend.

When the time arrived I touched the number I needed to call and got voice mail.  It was a little like deepened madness when I got voice mail, but I still felt positive.  I left a message. I waited, or more like hovered over my phone. 

Within three minutes of making the call, my phone alerted me that a call was coming in.  It was my friend!  Just as I had hoped, he was willing to help me and we scheduled a time to get together so we could review the work.  My angst turned into tranquility.

At ten-thirty a.m. we met where the work was to be completed.  We reviewed it.  Reed made a phone call.  He hit the end call button on his phone and looked at me with a smile.  “I’ll have everything finished by early tomorrow afternoon!” He said.

We continued on and looked at another window that had a broken mechanism.  I thought we could also have the window technician look at it when he came to do his work the next day.  It was not to be so.

Reed looked at the nonfunctioning piece as I showed it to him and he began to work on it.  I worried because I knew his time was limited.  He had big commitments to finish.  I said, “I know you have to go, this can wait.”

He just looked up at me and replied, “I don’t like to be defeated by anything!  I can figure this out.  I just don’t do this often enough to remember how to do it.”

He spent an hour with me and in the end he was not defeated!  He fixed the window as well as my challenges.  He also reminded me that with persistence, thought and experience new windows of opportunity can always be opened.

The Gentile Voice of Love

“You need to come up here!” (In an angry voice)

- The man with the little white dog

The Gentle Voice of Love

I sat in a small apartment with two men, one woman and a small white dog.  We were getting acquainted with each other and expressing pleasantries when the small dog jumped down to the floor and came over to sniff the trousers that covered my legs.  She could smell my dog so she stayed for a minute lingering in the in the aroma that filled her senses.

As she remained, her owner became anxious so I told him it was just fine, but I watched as his eyes expressed increasing displeasure.  He called to her.  She didn’t respond as he wished.  I watched the fire in his eyes grow!

In one violent eruption the sitting man stomped his foot hard on the floor and angrily yelled, “YOU COME UP HERE NOW!”

I felt my body respond to this outburst as it involuntarily pushed against the back of the couch in shock and dismay.  I watched the gentile little dog put her tail between her two back legs and jump up to her designated spot when threatened. Her little spirit was crushed.

Then, as quickly as the outburst began, I heard new sweet tones from the once contorted face: “I love you!”

“I love you?” I thought to myself.  Is that what love is?  Is love expressed through threats and angry lashing out?  Does one only love another when the other conforms exactly as commanded?

I watched as a large hand stroked the fir of the little one next to his lap.  Her eyes were filled with fear and anticipation, wondering how long this kindness would last.

“What a sad way to live” I thought.  Then I reflected on my own relationships.  How would an independent observer describe my interactions with others?  Would they express my actions as the gentle voice of love?  When others look at me, do they see kindness, consideration, and caring?  I hope so!

The greatest compliment one being can give another is to choose to love, and be with them.  It is the richest tribute to love and freedom I can think of.  When you extend your love to others freely, you’ll find that the sweetness of freedom will furnish fulfillment in ways you never anticipated.  When you allow others to give you their love, in their own way and of their own choice, your relationships will be filled with trust, caring and increased depth. 

The depth of your offered love will be reflected in your life immediately; you will enjoy additional freedom and a joy beyond description. Perhaps it seems too simple, but it’s not.  Allow the gentile voice of love to change your life today.

Chrisanne's Open House

An open house at C.G. Sparks

Chrisanne’s Open House

Sometimes I can be in a large crowd and feel utterly alone; strange how that can happen.  But that wasn’t the case during a gathering I attended not long ago.  My friend Chrisanne invited me to her store’s open house and I eagerly put it on my calendar.

When the day arrived I was excited to attend.  Yet, as the day wore on and became more complicated it was beginning to feel as if I would not be able to attend.  My final meeting of the day dragged on and on.  I felt like a kid trying to sleep on Christmas Eve! The specter of the open house was dancing in my head and I could visualize myself talking with my friends and family while walking in the midst of the beautiful offerings in Chrisanne’s store.

The first thing I saw when I arrived was an old Range Rover on the other side of the tree-height roll-up glass door.  It looked as if it was right off the set of an “Indiana Jones” movie.  Its rusted cargo bed was piled high with wooded boxes and furniture.

“That’s one of the best displays I’ve ever seen!” I thought to myself as I walked through the man-door and entered the large space.  A large warehouse-type building filled with people, food, antique furniture, music and the sounds of laughter.  It was good to be there!

Members of my family were also there and it didn’t take long to find them by winding my way around the throng as if I were one of the pythons from the jungles near the cities of India where Chrisanne personally selects her fine offerings.  Once united, we spent the rest of the evening acting like tourists in search of discovery as we talked and viewed the amazing sights.

New sights were all around us and just before we left I pulled my daughter close to me and whispered in her ear, “Look at how different all of these people are.  Isn’t it wonderful to be here to enjoy each other’s company?”

I smiled thinking, “I’m sure everyone is looking at me and saying, ‘look at that guy he doesn’t look anything like the people I usually associate with!’”

But there we all were; all having fun, all with people we loved, all friends & customers of Chrisanne! 

When we’re not remembering we’re Chrisanne’s Customers, we all spend our lives struggling to differentiate ourselves from those around us.  We work hard at being different.  We seek “our own.”  We associate with people sharing our beliefs and talk about how everyone should think and act as we do.  We try to be divided.

“Sad,” I thought as I left.  I would be a better person.  I’d be learning more.  I’d be discovering more.  I’d be more, if I would only spend at least as much of my time working to appreciate the differences of those around me as I do trying to separate myself from them.  So, I made the personal commitment to spend more time with “those people.”

After all, Chrisanne has shown us we’re all part of the human family and even though one third of all the ice cream eaten in the world is vanilla there are other wonderful flavors.  What would life be like without them?

Making Something Good of Yourself

“Didn’t you know that the most important thing you can do is to show up every day.”

-John Barlow

Making Something Good of Yourself

Have you ever had one of those weeks when it seems as if you’ve worked much harder than normal and yet it appears as if nothing good has come from it?  I have.  Yet, this week the exact opposite happened to me and I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about it.  I can’t remember a time when so many loose ends seemed to be coming together after long struggle.

During my time of reflection, I remembered a conversation I had with my friend John Barlow a few years ago.  We were talking about creating success through work when he said, “Didn’t you know that the most important thing you can do is to show up every day?”

His comment caught me off guard.  It was something I knew, but at the same time I also knew, and still know, that showing up isn’t the only thing that creates success.  It must be used in combination with a good solid plan and self discipline to complete each step of the plan.  Still, showing up is a critical part of the success equation and it’s what I want to talk with you about today.

As I raised my daughters they would come to me and ask me if I liked a particular person after just meeting them.  My reply would always be the same, “I don’t know.  Time will tell.”  I would say that because I have discovered that it takes a great deal of time to be able to judge a person’s true character; especially my own.

Each one of us has times of smooth sailing through life and then we also have times of difficulty.  It is what we do during times of difficulty that reveals our true character.  I have known people that have crumbled when challenged and I have known people who have withstood their challenges and have become much stronger.  In many cases it is as if there are times when the world says, “You say you are honest, true, good, strong and successful.  Let’s see if you really are!”

When that occurs, I have observed that those who have risen to meet the challenge do so not knowing exactly what the outcome will be and when they have given their last ounce of strength, but still continue to persist, the tide turns and things mysteriously begin to turn their way again.  When that happens it doesn’t take them long to get back on their feet and feel renewed strength and confidence.

That’s what I want you to know.  My personal experience is that as I have worked on projects or goals for many years and have felt that there was no hope of success, but have kept going and making adjustments along my way, believing that if I just kept striving and changing internally that I would succeed in the long run.  Many times my success did not come in the form of my expectation.  It had morphed into something better than I had hoped.  In fact, I had changed in ways I could never have dreamed of.

That’s how I know that persistence creates character.  It’s a message we need to pass to all those around us.  If we will simply persist in changing inside so we can meet our challenges and overcome them, we will succeed.  Only then we will be the kind of people others want to spend their lives with.  We will have demonstrated our true character and we will be able to say, “I have made something good of myself.”

Intangible Connections

“I’m so glad you came.  We do this every year.  I hope you will come again next summer!”

Camille Higgins

Intangible Connectivity

High in the mountains in the middle of the night there was a gunshot and then the loud clamor of pots and pans banging.  These noises at about two a.m. were not expected in such a normally serene atmosphere.  But, when there is a black bear prowling around a camp ground such noises at night are merely defensive blare until the morning glow bursts in as a protector.

In the light of the sun it was easy to see large paw prints on the damp ground and even on the sides of trucks, trailers, and motor homes.  These signs of the night’s prowler also served to stimulate excited conversation between traveling neighbors.  Who would have guessed that a group of people who live together in the same town and have known each other for many years would need to have a bear stimulate a conversation that would lead to deepened friendship and understanding? 

In fact, when riding in my friend Mike’s truck that very morning he said, “You know, I’ve known you for many years and have never really talked with you!”

Had my friend Danny and Mike & his wife Camille not planned and made all of the arrangements for this outing, the opportunity for me to spend time getting to know my neighbors better would have never happened.  We would have simply continued living our separate lives, together in the same town.  I would not have discovered the concept of Intangible Connectivity.

This trip caused me to understand that true relationships do not exist without a framework of Intangible Connectivity.  That is to say, living next to, or near someone else and knowing who they are does not automatically translate into friendship or really “knowing” them. 

To really get to know someone and become their friend you need to spend time with them.  You need to see the people they live their lives with.  You need to see how they react to challenging situations that surprise them.  You need to open your ears and listen to their dreams, hopes and plans for the future; intangibles.  Intangibles are things that allow you to have more than a superficial relationship; things that build a deeper connection. 

Connections to other people are the generator of life.  They are the creator of joy, long term happiness and wealth in all areas of your life.  Build greater connections today by spending time with your neighbors and friends.  Invite them into your life and enjoy the results. 

I’ve seen my camping friends since our trip.  We greeted each other warmly, like never before.  After all, we faced death from the jaws of a bear, road ATVs, fished, cooked over a fire, and talked for several days.  Now I call all of that an Intangible Connection.