"Let the Present In" Monday's Warm Cocoa 2.9.2026

"Maybe it isn’t about forgetting the past.” – One friend to another

Let the Present In

The two friends had just patched things up after their very public argument. Both of them could be characterized as men, but they were both really just on the cusp of being so, since they still lacked seasoning; the process of acquiring maturity, wisdom, and competence through wide-ranging life experience, and time.

“I know I get caught up in being afraid,” Mica explained to his friend, a few days after their argument, while sitting on his porch. “When that happens, I seem to automatically wreak some chaos. I guess thanks how I distract myself from fear.” 

Garr sat listening carefully as Mica explained himself, while recognizing the opening for his own apology.

“I’m sorry too,” he said sincerely. “I seem to always be living in the past, no matter how hard I try to forget it!”

The two of them were more alike than they had ever suspected! They were realizing, for the very first time, that they were facing a common antagonist. A painful past. Both of the young men had lost their core families at a young age. 

Mica’s loss of his mother came when he was about eleven years old. Since then he had faced a life of survival. He was on his own and had a hard time forming friendships. He trusted no one!

Garr trusted no one either. He was the “black sheep” of his family, different than all of them; a fact emphasized by the memorable sight of his father becoming so angry with him that he got in his vehicle and flew away. Garr could only stand and watch as he was left standing alone in an unfamiliar and mostly strange part of the planet. He was about sixteen when that happened. It was a past that shaped his isolated view of the world every single day.

“Perhaps,” Garr said as he looked at his only and newly trusted friend. “Maybe it isn’t about forgetting the past. Perhaps the trick is not to forget the past, but to remember it.”

Mica sat there with surprise racing across his face as he heard Garr say that. After all, they had just discovered that they were both trapped in their past, trauma. But, their unfamiliar, shared moment of trust allowed him to hold his tongue and wait for Garr to finish.

“Perhaps the trick is not to forget the past, but to remember it, while allowing the present in.”

That’s when both friends sat there, quietly together, allowing their trust of each other to settle in. To become comfortable, like a well-worn, soft pair of jeans. Letting the present in.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as an Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1xZQuYPScTjjNNeNY96xXOVc4azkWay8v/view?usp=sharing

"Common Ground" Monday's Warm Cocoa 2.2.2026

"What began in confrontation ended with in a brotherly embrace.” - Daniel Swede

Common Ground

In the end, the two men embraced as their differences had been transformed into commonality. But their encounter did not begin on such friendly ground.

Daniel was looking forward to gathering with associates and friends last Thursday. The get-together had been planned to occur a couple of days earlier, but had been pushed-out as a result of the unusually icy, cold weather.

“I think we all were suffering from a little cabin fever,” Daniel said, just before walking into the designated ‘watering hole.’”

There was a sparkle in his eye as he pulled the door open, seeing friends he hadn’t seen for a few weeks. His confidence was overflowing as he spotted Grace and her soft gray eyes. Those eyes were her “tell.” They told everyone she happened upon how kind she was. The evening was beginning just as he had hoped.

That same hope blossomed as he glanced across the room to see other friends sitting at a long, rectangular table. So, he skipped (well, sort of for a man of his age) over to the table to greet them warmly, conversing as he sat with them.

“What do you think of the news?” Eric asked.

“I was with friends,” Daniel said. “So, I didn’t worry about my answer to that seemingly harmless question. I have to tell you I was taken aback by Eric’s vehement reaction to my answer. I had never seen him so hostile.”

Eric’s response was instant. “How could anyone be stupid enough to think that!”

Eric raged in Daniel’s face for a time. So much so that Daniel’s pleasant hopes for his much anticipated, warm cordial evening with friends seemed to be dashed. And, to his credit, he sat patiently, calmly, listening to Eric.

Everyone else at the table tuned out because of the singularly, heated exchange. Their body language ensued separation from the onslaught. Daniel, partly due to his being the one assailed, stayed both absorbed and shielded.

He was absorbing the information coming rapidly at him while searching for commonality. He had been in such confrontations before and felt confident that his listening skills would guide him forward toward a positive outcome for everyone.

“I knew a little bit about Eric and could tell he was passionate about being good to other people. After all, I knew he had served in special forces, because he wanted to protect others. That knowledge was confirmed quite quickly as I listened to what he was saying. So, I began agreeing with his, our common, caring nature. That allowed Eric to recognize the common ground we were standing on!”

As a result, the evening quickly got back on track and the whole table of people were once again actively engaged in friendly, enlivened camaraderie.

“What began in confrontation ended with in a brotherly embrace,” Daniel said gratefully.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as an Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qmK_Rav__c636P6Vix0K8pYya7sqP0mi/view?usp=sharing

"Small and Important," Monday's Warm Cocoa 1.26.2026

"Sometimes purpose is something small and personal.” – Twila Newton

Small and Important

“The teacher is now the student,” I thought as Twila was speaking with seemingly every eye in the room focused on her. There were lots of eyes in the room.

The room was filled with adult students. Every one attending was there to gain a new understanding of the power of purpose. They came into the class seeking a new, or expanded understanding of how to capture and internalize a grand personal purpose.

“Sometimes when you and I see the immensity of the universe and then look in the mirror it’s easy to become overwhelmed by our own smallness,” the presenter said, while showing a photo of the vastness and grandeur of stars and planets gloried in space.

“But,” the presenter continued, “each individual can find a large personal purpose. A purpose that can give meaning, depth and an inner drive toward exceptional achievement.” There was a pause then, to allow a dramatic absorption of that theory.

That’s when Twila, an older, worn looking woman, hesitantly allowed her fingers to point toward the ceiling, pulling her right arm up, as if attached to uncertain puppet master’s string.

“I don’t think purpose has to be large and grand,” she said in a quavering voice.

Those words seemed to be a sharp pin, purposely positioned to pierce an invisible balloon holding air in the room. Because, all of the air seemingly began to leave the room. Silence ensued.

The presenter relaxed. Then he settled on the edge of a table near the podium, where he sat. His eyes were focused on Twila. His face immediately morphed into a genteel caring sponge. He was listening, considering.

“I came into a meeting one time,” Twila continued. “There was a new woman there. I could tell she was feeling cautious. So, I went up to her and introduced myself saying, you know, I hadn’t come to a meeting like this for about fifty years; until last fall. I know what it’s like to take a big step into the unknown!”

She went on to explain that after that small interchange the new woman relaxed and enjoyed being there. It allowed her to forget that she the feeling of being alone.

“When that meeting ended,” Twila said with emotion choking, no emphasizing, her words. “That same woman came up to me with tears flowing as she hugged me with gratitude for being able to embrace the finding of a new friend.”

Then she finished her point. “The experience taught me that small purpose is often the most important purpose a person and find. Sometimes purpose is something small and personal.”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as an Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qmK_Rav__c636P6Vix0K8pYya7sqP0mi/view?usp=sharing

"Origin Story" Monday's Warm Cocoa 1.19.2026

"Connection, influence, and real leadership begin when you tell your story authentically.” – John Bates

Origin Story

“Connection, influence, and real leadership begin when you tell your story authentically,” John said with hawk-like intent.

John didn’t stop there. He told a story himself to make his point stick. After all, he also teaches that every story told should make a point.

“Let me tell you how much we all love stories! We spend hours and hours listening to and watching stories. But, when we’re watching a movie and someone you know calls, you touch pause on the movie share in their story! That alone shows you how important the story-connection between people is,” John illustrated.

Telling a story is the very best way for us to remember something. We may not remember the entire story word for word, but we’ll remember the point of the story, if not forever, for a very long time. I can still travel to the past in a flash, to the flicker of a dancing camp fire, to be with a couple of my buddies, to relive stories forged then and there again.

I can see Kevin Young’s matted, camp fire smoked hair, cradled by his interlaced hands behind his head. I see the stars, bright in the dark sky above. One star was moving!

Kevin comments and asks, “look at that one. It’s moving! What’s up with that?”

“It’s a satellite,” I respond.

“Is that via satellite?”

My ears are tickled again by remembered-laughter as I tell him that “via satellite” means “transmitted by satellite” to your TV. At that we laugh and laugh together for a long time before settling into our sleeping bags to ward-off the dropping temperatures of the night. We were friends for years prior to that evening, but our shared experience and that story cemented our bond for our lifetime. People want and need a human such connection.

It is the human connection that allows us to mirror each other as we experience stories. We mirror facial expressions, movements and emotions! We believe the stories that the teller believes! So, give others something wonderful to mirror. How do you do that?

Begin with a story about your own origin. Tell it to others when they ask about you. Do it by purposefully thinking about who you’re talking to and what you want them to know about you.

What is it that makes you, well, you? What is it that one moment that caused you to begin to write the story of the life you’ve been living?

John says, “when you share your origin story you open space for others to share their stories with you as well. It will create deeper trust and relationships with all people. We share stories because they have an impact on others!”

Connection, influence, and real leadership do indeed begin when you tell your own story authentically. We can’t wait to hear your story!

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as an Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qmK_Rav__c636P6Vix0K8pYya7sqP0mi/view?usp=sharing

"Fish Eye" Monday's Warm Cocoa 1.12.2026

"If we dynamically look toward what nourishes us, we’ll be endowed to vigorously pursue it” – Katie Buttle

Fish Eye

“For some reason my daughter decided to get fish for a pet,” Katie said, before diving deeper. “I’m a ‘dog-person’ so the idea that fish could be a great pet was a bit befuddling.

Sometimes, though, moments of befuddlement open new currents of insight. Such opportunities are almost always tickling bubbles of unexpected surprise. And, Katie’s almost daily interaction with her daughter’s pet fish unpredictably prompted her toward a very unexpected, well, new-sight she calls seeing through “fish eyes.”

“I go into my daughter’s room regularly,” she explained. “I’m in there as part of everyday life. You know, putting away freshly laundered clothes, or pushing a vacuum cleaner over the carpet. It took me a while but I began to notice something very interesting about the fish swimming around in that tank.”

There is a small container of fish food sitting on top of the aquarium. It’s there as a reminder to feed those pet fish. After all, teenagers are often focused on lots of activities and school work. An active, busy life makes it easy to forget quietly swimming fish, gliding through temperature controlled, mechanically generated oxygenated water!

“The fish live in a fully controlled environment,” Katie continued. “Everything is provided for them. They don’t get to control anything, except for two things!”

Katie knew one of those fish-controlled actions naturally. The fish can decide if they want to eat the food given to them. But, it took her quite a bit of observation to discover the second thing the fish fully control. Where they look.

“After walking past the aquarium lots of times, I began to notice that the fish would swim toward the front glass and intently watch me! At first, I thought I was just imagining it. But, I began to go into the room just to test them. I was curious to know if those fish eyes were really tracking my movements,” She elucidated. “They were! I was so happy to know that I wasn’t delusional!”

The fish had learned that their food appeared, was delivered, when a human walked up to their tank. So, it didn’t take them long before they began to put the bubble hazed pieces together. They would see a person approach, believe that food would be provided and then place themselves into a sustenance-seizing position.

“Fish eyes taught me the importance of having a dynamic focus! I’ve been taught this principle for a lifetime, but its importance has never been as impactful until viewed through fish eyes. If we dynamically look toward what nourishes us, we’ll be endowed to vigorously pursue it for our own benefit,” Katie said of what she’s learned from those unexpected, insightful, following fish eyes.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as an Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qmK_Rav__c636P6Vix0K8pYya7sqP0mi/view?usp=sharing

"In From the Cold" Monday's Warm Cocoa 1.5.2026

"We’ve set up a warming center in my church” – Tommy Smith

In from the Cold

In the very early morning of a cold, cold day, Tommy Smith walked into the gym all bundled. That was a big change from his normal dress of a t-shirt and athletic shorts.

“Wow! It’s cold out there,” Tommy said as he walked through the door from the anteroom. “This cold and dark makes it hard for me to get up and work out this early!”

The other eight eyes walking into the room glanced at him in agreement. It was clear that winter had arrived and everyone in the little gym was grateful to be able to come in from the cold. Even if it was for the purpose of sweating for an hour, or more. Talk of the weather was a great way to break the ice hampering conversation at 4:45 a.m. and the discussion of the impactful temperature continued between the athletic friends.

“We’ve set up a warming center at my church,” Tommy continued. “We’re in the process of getting volunteers to greet and serve those seeking shelter; coming in from the cold. Once we have enough volunteers we’ll assign shifts to make sure we have people there to help at all hours.”

“This would be the perfect shift for you to take,” one buddy in the room responded. “After all, this time is most difficult for many and it wouldn’t be even be noticeable to you. You’re here every morning with us already!”

“Right? Most volunteers won’t want the 4:00 a.m. shift,” Tommy agreed. “But, I’ll fill in where ever I’m needed. It’s cold out there!”

All of the heads in the gym were bobbing up and down, like little yellow, rubber duckies floating on an agitated pond. And, those same heads were bobbing up and down once again as the workout had finished and everyone in the room was layering on hats, gloves, pants, and coats as if decorating a layered birthday cake. Such decoration against the cold took a lot of preparation.

The cold stayed the entire day. It continued through the night and into the wee hours of the next morning, when all of the buddies hit the gym again. Well, that isn’t exactly accurate. One of the guys was absent. Tommy!

He wasn’t there when the guys came in from the cold again and began removing the thick frosting protecting them from extreme temperatures. Their heads were bobbing up and down again as one of them spoke up.

“Tommy’s missing because he’s likely helping others come in from the cold. He’s surely in his church’s warming center,” he said. “He’d never say anything, because helping others isn’t something he ever takes credit for.”

This time, there were mumbles of agreement confirming Tommy’s character and those mumbles broke the ice again because Randy said, “let’s get going! It ain’t going to happen by itself!”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as an Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/10S8aY1KXHyzkBm-Xm7gUyQecrZqeYJNI/view?usp=sharing

"On the Inside" Monday's Warm Cocoa 12.29.2025

"I had a strong feeling." – Randy Cummins

On the Inside

“I wanted to give you a call,” Randy said in an unusually subdued tone. “I wanted you to know.”

Randy was on his way home from the hospital. He had been in the hospital for a few days after suffering a considerable heart attack and receiving a subsequent surgery to restore blood flow. It was just like him to think about others! It is his natural instinct and practice, yet I was about to learn something more profound about him. Randy is led from the inside, out.

“I had a strong feeling,” he said as he began to explicate.

He had been deeply touched by the example and kindness of one particular family many years ago. They had come to his aid when his first daughter was born.

“They opened their hearts and home to us when we really needed help,” he continued. “They didn’t know us well at the time. All they knew was that we needed help. So, they assisted us without asking anything in return.”

Randy went on to say that the strong feelings he was having had created an internal, profound urgency. He was driven by the importance of expressing gratitude to this decades-old difference making family. To express the feelings of his heart, to let them know that even after many years their kindness was still impacting him. And, at the same time, he had another feeling impressing on him.

“Almost concurrently, earlier in the day, I sat with my wife and we discussed deeply meaningful things,” Randy continued. “I just thought it was an important thing to do at the moment. It wasn’t long after I had finished that I was sitting at my desk.”

Randy went to get up from his desk, after sending the message expressing his gratitude and collapsed. His son came running in to help him, followed closely by his wife. He told them he thought he’d be okay. Yet, Randy’s son immediately called for help and got him to the hospital. It was a good thing he did!

Once in the hospital Randy was rushed into life saving surgery. His call to me came two days later as he was being driven home.

“You somehow knew inside that something major was about to happen. It was a gift to be willing to listen on the inside,” I said with reverence.

“The feelings were strongly influential and I’m glad I listened,” Randy said in reply. “Because sometimes timing is indeed everything and the chance to listen ends. Listen on the inside.”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as an Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/10S8aY1KXHyzkBm-Xm7gUyQecrZqeYJNI/view?usp=sharing