“I didn’t know they were leaning until I saw them from a different angle, from a neighboring yard.” – Tony Garcia

Another View

A man was dangling from ropes at the top of a broad, tall, seemingly ancient oak tree. He had a chainsaw in one gloved hand and a lifeline-thread clutched in another. To look at him do his work was equally a glimpse of daredevil living and unsettling.

Unsettling because few people are willing to bet their life on the strength of a rope alone. Especially while holding that line while brandishing a live chainsaw. It all seemed a little crazy! But, there was a reason for this work.

Tony, a landscape expert, looked from that yard at two adjoining yards as he was working his vegetal magic. He has years of experience related to salvation of such mighty oak trees. 

“We trim the trees to remove dead branches and even out the canopy,” he explained to the watching neighbors. “That way, when the strong winds blow against the trees they’ll have a paramount chance to withstand a turbulent onslaught.”

His words were practically prophetic, because not more than thirty days later, such treacherous air-torrents did their worst. Seemingly indestructible Oaks were proven and judged differently. Lucky trees had limbs claiming the ground all around their base. Unlucky trees found themselves having roots without the ground and were doomed.

Three or four weeks later Tony was back to look at the trees he had prepared for the unexpected, possible devastation. To his gratification, the trees he had sculpted stood strong and were mostly undamaged. They were a monolith testament to his skill and he stood there savoring his tree-sculpting success. And, he looked again next door.

He saw two huge oak trees standing together.

“I didn’t know they were leaning until I saw them from a different angle, from a neighboring yard,” Tony said. “So, I went over to talk to those neighbors.”

When he talked with the neighbors they were surprised. Because, while standing close to those trees they seemed to be straight, strong and healthy. They were strong and healthy, yet leaning. And, the vivid memory of recent tree-killing-storms brought to mind the real possibility that these trees could crash into their home, crushing it. Suddenly, the strength and health of the seemingly solid and immovable were in question.

Such seemingly permeance and strength can sometimes be seen for what it is, an illusion, when examined from another point of view. A caring friend who possesses understanding, expertise and knowledge can help sculpt our lives in preparation to battle the potential treacherous air-torrents of life.

They can offer an alternative, beneficial and sometimes life-saving assessment.

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I’ve helped thousands of people, as a real estate & lifestyle expert, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve Realesation. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1rv-M3STZZFYUcWvqdlamPYy7_5MXNWy4?usp=drive_link

“Adam’s friend called us from the emergency room.” – Chris Kendall

Unanticipated

She held me tight and sobbed on my shoulder. This unanticipated and poignant embrace allowed me to feel the depth of Rebecca’s pain. It radiated through me like the burning of an overheated sun. Hers was the first embrace received, immediately upon my arrival. Another almost identical emotional squeeze was to follow directly.

Chris Kendall came next, delivering a follow-on embrace, as soon as his spouse, Rebecca pulled away. He is a tall, broad shouldered man of seventy-seven years and every inch of his frame was mourning. His lamentation gripped my entirety, causing even my bones to hurt, especially as he spoke in broken alterations between halting, catching-breaths and tears.

“His friend called us from the emergency room. She wanted us to know what was happening,” he began. “It was late at night when she called. We were getting ready to go visit family in Illinois.”

While pulling away, Chris seemed to gain a sad, yet brief composure, whilst continuing to stand next to me, as if creating veiled separation from the invited-crowd as he continued.

“Even though Adam was being attended by physicians in the medical school hospital where he worked, the doctors didn’t know what was wrong. Nobody did. Then, I heard a noise I’ll never forget! The medical-monitor-flat-line sound cruelly shrilled my son’s death, while on that call.”

We were standing in that same hospital. This time all gathered there were convoked to honor and celebrate the too-short-life of Adam Kendall.

“Look at all the people here!” I expressed to Chris and Rebecca with an accompanying physical gesture. “These people loved Adam and they’ve come to show that affection, as well as to offer you support.

That support is truly needed by Chris and Rebecca. After all, they moved here from Colorado a couple of years ago, just to be closer to their beloved son. Adam had lived here for a mere four years, as part of his short forty-three earth measured years.

“It was too soon! He was too young! We don’t even know why he died, what caused it! I miss him already and I’ll miss him forever,” Chris conveyed after nearly everyone had left the hospital-lobby-filled celebration.

It was time for me to leave too, after another compassionate embrace with Chris and Rebecca. We communicated our leave-taking with shared, gratitude-filled valedictory smiles. Because, though the lobby space was no longer bursting with friends and admirers of Adam, the combined love of friends and family had filled our hearts with comfort, hope and in an unanticipated way, with Adam.

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I’ve helped thousands of people, as a real estate & lifestyle expert, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve Realesation. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1rv-M3STZZFYUcWvqdlamPYy7_5MXNWy4?usp=drive_link

Butterfly Lady - Monday's Warm Cocoa, 1 July 2024

“The biggest and most disastrous moments in a person’s life can be the most defining of a person’s character and a person’s heart.” – David Willard

Butterfly Lady

“Did you have damage from the tornadoes that hit your area on Memorial Day,” I asked.

“Not this time,” Vicki responded. “We were lucky those nine tornadoes didn’t combine into one super funnel cloud like what happened in Joplin.”

Vicki Bronson then asked, “have you heard of the Butterfly Lady?”

“No,” I said, just before she rehearsed it.

Vicki used to live in Joplin Missouri. She was there when that big tornado came to alter the landscape and lives.

“There’s a monument inspired by the Butterfly Lady in Joplin,” Vicki continued.

A family of five, upon hearing the tornado warning sirens, rushed to their basement seeking shelter. They made it to the basement, mostly. 

When the mother looked around the basement she was immediately distraught. The storm was battering their home. They could hear it lifting and tearing the structure above them away. And worse, their youngest son was not in the basement with them!

They couldn’t leave until the storm passed and they couldn’t search for their not-to-be-found son until then either. They hunkered down and prayed. Then in mere moments, a seeming eternity for the freighted family in the basement, the funnel cloud savaged onward. They could leave their refuge.

Once upstairs, with feeble sunshine filtering through clouds in an otherwise dark sky, they saw true devastation. Their house was gone. Everything was gone! And, there was no sign of their son. They were filled with shock, especially when they noticed an unrecognized car sitting near the foundation of their now destroyed house. Surprisingly, that car was completely undamaged!

They cautiously approached the undamaged car while calling-out the name of their son in desperation. They kept calling until they were so close to the car they could touch it, and hear their son’s response from inside the car’s trunk!

After getting him out of the trunk, by hitting a trunk open switch in the cockpit, they asked him how he got into the trunk, as they couldn’t locate a key to the car. That’s when the five-year-old child said, “The Butterfly Lady put me in there, told me I’d be safe and not to worry.”

“The Butterfly Lady?” they queried.

“Yes,” he said. “She was a lady with wings just like a butterfly.”

The boy’s survival, assurance and story inspired the community of Joplin to create “The Butterfly Garden and Overlook.” They regard it as a “sacred place for individuals to work through the pain of grieving and acceptance of the reality of their loss” resulting from the most devastating storm in the town’s history.

The garden’s “penciled” outline of homes represents all homes erased by the storm. There is also a thirty-eight-segment waterfall representing the number of minutes the tornado was on the ground.

David Willard, contributor of a monument in the garden, chiseled in stone, “The biggest and most disastrous moments in a person’s life can be the most defining of a person’s character and a person’s heart.”

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I’ve helped thousands of people, as a real estate & lifestyle expert, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve Realesation. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home By Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1rv-M3STZZFYUcWvqdlamPYy7_5MXNWy4?usp=drive_link

“What should young people do with their lives today? Many things, obviously. But the most daring thing is to create stable communities in which the terrible disease of loneliness can be cured.” ― Kurt Vonnegut

Daring Thing

Kurt Vonnegut was an author known for his satirical and darkly humorous novels. Over fifty years he published fourteen novels, three short-story collections, five plays, and five nonfiction works. I was reading one of his novels for pure enjoyment, sitting comfortably on an airplane, on my way out of town.

The flight was just over two hours in length, so I was able to make good headway into the novel and I knew time had flown along too. I looked out the window searching for a geographical bearing to determine how soon we’d be landing before beginning the upcoming, lengthy chapter. The scenery made the decision for me. I’d never finish that long chapter before landing. Yet, I had a few minutes, so I read “about the author,” which contained an impactful, noteworthy passage.

“What should young people do with their lives today? Many things, obviously. But the most daring thing is to create stable communities in which the terrible disease of loneliness can be cured,” Kurt Vonnegut said as part of an autobiographical collage.

I pondered this message through the final minutes of the flight and while taxing to the gate. Then, as passengers began to disembark it came to life in an unexpected way.

My travel bag happened to be in an overhead compartment, across the aisle and two rows back. You know how it is. In order for me to retrieve my bag as other passengers yearned to exit the aluminum tube would have been analogous to a salmon swimming against the current, hoping to spawn. So, I settled into my seat while thinking I’d simply wait until everyone had left the plane. It was not to be so.

Just as I had settled I felt a gentle pressure on my right shoulder and heard a kind voice from behind. It was a young man. The man directly behind me; someone unknown to me. 

“Isn’t your bag a couple of rows back?” he inquired.

“Yes, it is that blue bag across the aisle,” I responded with surprised gratitude.

“I can get that for you,” he said as he reached back carefully, over heads and through other bodies until he captured my bag and handed it to me.

“Thank you! You’re so kind,” I said with my brightest, gratitude-broadened smile, while contemplating the impact of a young man’s, “daring act to cure the terrible disease of loneliness!”

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I’ve helped thousands of people, as a real estate & lifestyle expert, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve Realesation. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home By Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1rv-M3STZZFYUcWvqdlamPYy7_5MXNWy4?usp=drive_link

“Nothing extraordinary has ever been found on the path of least resistance.” 

– Douglas McCarter

Putting Betrayal in its Place 

James had just finished a presentation marathon. Now he was sitting at a round table with a drink in one hand and a fork in the other. He was relaxing after a grueling day and evening. 

I came to sit across the table from him while thinking, “Does a former Marine Corps Intelligence NCO ever really relax?”

That’s when his smile, hidden most of the time behind his trimmed facial hair, broke through to answer my question. It was a smile that was easy and unburdened. It was the expression of someone at peace with self, a person with quiet, confirmed confidence, a confidence derived from having walked a challenging path.

“This is the second company I’ve created,” James said right before deepening his story with background. “I wouldn’t have been able to start Shadowscape without buttressed learning and companionship from my wife and my father, Douglas McCarter.”

Douglas McCarter grew up in poverty, but he wasn’t penurious in spirit. He was ambitious. He was the first person in his family to attend and graduate from college. He earned his MBA from UCLA and his BS in mechanical engineering at UCSB. After graduation he went on to become a senior member of the corporate planning staff for Morrison-Knudsen, was CFO of Emkay Development for a time and started several successful construction companies. He continually worked hard and even when the economic conditions of the Great Recession crushed his business he taught James a phrase that provided him with fortitude when his business partners betrayed him while selling their company.

“Nothing Extraordinary has ever been found on the path of least resistance,” Douglas imparted to James.

The other founders of James’ former company enriched themselves and left him with virtually nothing.

“That’s when my wife, during my deepest despair, said, ‘We have each other and even though we don’t have much money, we have a roof over our heads and love binding us together. Start a new company and I’ll be here with you through it all, win or lose!’”

So, James started a new company, Shadowscape, with his wife and father by his side.

James knows a thing or two about what it’s like to live life’s path. He knows the importance of living with people who will walk the path toward the extraordinary with him. He knows the pain of living through and with betrayal. Now, he knows the feeling of putting betrayal in its place; on the path behind him. That’s its place.

James is firmly on the path toward finding the extraordinary, with his loved ones by his side. 

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I’ve helped thousands of people, as a real estate & lifestyle expert, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve Realesation. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home By Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1M8ru02iWVObDzGsbKB1xUYyRMxfiYlez/view?usp=sharing

    William James

“It’s the little things that make the big things possible.” – J. Willard Marriott

Inches

“I knew the answer before I made my comment to the entire Board of Directors,” Chris said as he talked about his experience of being asked to fire a large percentage of his sales team.

Chris knew that as soon as he refused to fire the people who had been keeping his company afloat, as a result of their exceptional work that he would be losing his own job and position as a Director. 

“What was being asked of me was not the moral thing to do,” he said. “I knew everyone sitting around that boardroom table would view me as not being a team player; not being reasonable. At the same time, I was not willing to do a wrong thing, just so I could keep my job, especially when company leadership had just proven themselves to be morally bankrupt.”

Chris would not budge one inch! And, at the same time, he soon learned the benefits of adhering to the principle of “Unreasonable Transformation.”

That’s when specific, pertinent words of William James came to rushing to mind, as if part of the cool breeze brushing past, and produced by Chris’ story, “Most people live, whether physically, intellectually or morally, in a very restricted circle of their potential being. They make use of a very small portion of their possible consciousness, and of their soul’s resources in general, much like a man who, out of his whole bodily organism, should get into a habit of using and moving only his little finger. Great emergencies and crises show us how much greater our vital resources are than we had supposed.”

Chris had just created his own personal emergency! Yet, he understood the majesty of possessing a moral character. At the same time, he had removed a surety of continuous internal struggle, had he succumbed to the antithesis of his core beliefs. Now it was time to move another inch, past the crisis.

 “I learned that the answer to most pernicious business dilemmas is to give more, not less; and that magic happens as a result,” Chris elucidated.

So, he made a call to a recruiter and rather than asking for her to help him find a new position he asked her to help him find a business he could buy in to.

“She said, ‘when can you have coffee with me?’ Then I moved the next inch by having coffee with her while we structured our new partnership!”

Today, Chris and Linda, his business partner, help their clients to move forward one inch at a time by having faith in the same process; Unreasonable Transformation, because they know “It’s the little things that make the big things possible.”

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I’ve helped thousands of people, as a real estate & lifestyle expert, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve Realesation. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home By Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1M8ru02iWVObDzGsbKB1xUYyRMxfiYlez/view?usp=sharing

 

“I love the way our community has come together!” – Randy Duncan

Unbroken

“I love the way our community has come together! As a result, we’ve made amazing clean-up progress,” Randy Duncan said with authenticity. 

He and his family were out of town, in Branson, when a group of twelve tornados simultaneously attacked Benton County, Arkansas very early Sunday morning, the day before Memorial Day.

“We had just settled back in our hotel room at about 1:30 a.m. when I got a call from my sister,” Randy explained. “She asked if we were alright. I said, ‘Yes. Why?’ Then she told me our community had been hit by a gaggle of tornados.”

Randy and his family stayed for the rest of the night in their hotel room. They needed the rest, as they had spent the evening enjoying a concert and knew they’d need a lot of emotional and physical stamina to deal with whatever awaited them back home.

Luckily, when they got home in Rogers, they found their home in tact, but buried in green debris.

“I was able to get my chain saw out to cut the broken trees strewn across my property,” he continued. “When I got all that debris piled up I finished checking my home’s structure. We were lucky!”

Roger’s father lives about two miles away and he was not as lucky. His home was positioned at the start of a F2 tornado that flowed east for 1.8 miles. That funnel went on a rampage from his house through thousands of businesses and homes leaving destruction along its entire path. That single tornado was a major destructor. But, it wasn’t alone.

There was a F3 tornado just up the road that set a record for width in Arkansas. It was 1.8 miles wide and it left the town of Decatur obliterated. Thad Eiland’s eyes were filled with sadness when he added, “It completely destroyed businesses, homes, barns, shops, crops and animals.”

“Benton County looks like a war zone,” Randy continued. “There is so much loss. Businesses are gone. City Halls are gone. Homes are gone. But our community stands. We are ok. But so many, SO MANY, are not and our souls ache from experiencing this devastation to our community.” 

The destruction was confirmed by a Rogers City police statement saying that conditions remain dangerous because of 1,200 downed power poles and gas leaks. They asked people not to come into closed areas while professionals work over days, weeks and months to make hardest hit areas safe again. Their official statement continued.

“What can you do? Check on your neighbors. Make sure they’re okay.” 

And, that’s what neighbors have done and will be doing for a long time!

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I’ve helped thousands of people, as a real estate & lifestyle expert, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve Realesation. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home By Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1M8ru02iWVObDzGsbKB1xUYyRMxfiYlez/view?usp=sharing