“The doctors told us that he’d never be able to talk again.  Listen to him now!” – Millicent Penovich

Millicent the Magnificent

We stood on the foothills of the Oquirrh Mountains looking across the rolling, golden hills.  The rustle of waiving, native ryegrass created a rushing sound which enveloped us.  Lamar and Millicent would normally be easily understood in any conversation.  But something had changed that.

Lamar struggled to get his words out, because he recently had a stroke.  And, while his words were not clearly there, his eyes were.  I could see frustration held back, just behind his pupils, as if corralled by an earthen dam.  He could still think clearly.  He just wasn’t able to communicate in the same way he normally could with everyone else.  Except for Millicent.

Millicent has been Lamar’s spouse for more than thirty years and this familiarity, combined with love, has provided them with a higher level of communication.  This mountainside meeting was the perfect time and viewpoint for them to demonstrate this.  There was Lamar trying to climb the mountain of speaking what his mind was thinking.  And, there was Millicent standing beside him, reading him, understanding him and becoming his voice of patience.

I say patience because Lamar was forced to be patient with both Millicent and me during our attempted understanding.  I also say patience because I watched Millicent carefully and lovingly listen, repeat and listen again.  She never tired of this process even though I knew it was a constant in every one of her days and nights.

“Love never fails!  She is magnificent!”  I thought to myself as I observed and participated in this mountain-climbing-exercise about seven months ago.  We had not spoken verbally much at all since then.

That changed over the past couple of weeks as we were directly working together again.  That’s how I know Lamar and Millicent have traveled almost to the top of their communication mountain.  We were conversing on the phone and I could understand almost everything Lamar was saying!  Of course, there were a few stumbling points.  And, when there was such moment Millicent was there beside him, reading him, understanding him and continuing to be his voice of patience.

“Look at you!”  I exclaimed to Lamar.  “You’re talking like a river flows!”

“He’s doing very well!”  Millicent responded.  “The doctors told us that he’d never be able to talk again.  Listen to him now!”

“Listen to him now, indeed!”  I thought, as I remembered that particular summer day, when we were standing on the foothills of the Oquirrh Mountains, looking across the rolling, golden hills that make up their beautiful property.  The rustle of waiving, native ryegrass created a rushing sound which enveloped us.  Lamar and Millicent would normally be easily understood in any conversation.  But a stroke had changed that for the both of them.

Yet, the real, most important change, came into Lamar’s life long ago.  And today, Millicent the Magnificent is still, steadfastly standing at his side, making a hard time easier, while filling their lives with unwavering love, and understanding.  She’s an example, to you and me, of how we can devotedly ascend every one of life’s mountains beside those we love.

Sniffing-out the Spectacular

“To look at a thing is quite different from seeing a thing, and one does not see anything until one sees its beauty.” - MINNIE DRIVER - Miss Mabel Chiltern.

Sniffing-out the Spectacular

I walk my dog every morning.  You know my dog, Harry Pupper.  I started walking just for the exercise and then it was also because I could see how much Harry enjoyed it.  I could tell how much he loved it, because he would wake up, pretend to be sleeping, and wait.  Wait for the click.

The click I’m referring to is the sound made by my turning the garage door deadbolt.  It’s the same click that tells the Pupper its time for us to satisfy our need for wanderlust.  Every dog seems to have this desire tucked deep inside.  They love to wander.  So do I.  It’s something we share.

There’s something special about wandering time.  And, it’s even better when done with a buddy.  So, I thought my wandering mornings couldn’t get any better.  I was wrong.

Just three days ago, as we were out, just before the sun, I saw something extraordinary.  It made me stop and capture the moment in a photograph.  It also made me stop and ask two questions.

“What if I lived my life like this every day?  What if, while wandering through each day, I actively look for the spectacular?”

Those questions caused me to decided that the Pupper and were going to test our little “Seeking the spectacular” experiment by actively looking for the special while wandering the next couple of mornings.  And, you know what?  We found that we began to see things we’d never seen, or perhaps noticed before. Even though we’d obviously walked right past them afore.

For example, we discovered one of the most beautiful sculptures we’d ever seen.  As we happened upon it, I remember asking Harry Pupper, “Have you noticed this before?”  

“It just goes to show, that we begin to see what exactly we’re looking for!”  

Of course, as soon as my words hit Harry’s soft furry ears, I recalled one of my favorite movie quotes from the film “An Ideal Husband.”

“To look at a thing is quite different from seeing a thing, and one does not see anything until one sees its beauty.” - MINNIE DRIVER - Miss Mabel Chiltern.

Then, as if scripted, Harry and I happened upon a small, big-mouth-full, green ball.

The Pupper loves to play ball.  I kicked it.  He chased.  We played ball for the rest of our stroll, as the sun continue to rise higher in the sky.  It was second dawning.

Having fun while looking for the spectacular increases its impact!

I walk my dog every morning.  You know my dog, Harry Pupper.  I started walking just for the exercise and then, it was also because I could see how much Harry enjoyed it.  I could tell how much he loved it, because he would wake up, pretend to be sleeping, and wait.  Wait for the click.

The click I’m referring to is the sound made by my turning the garage door deadbolt.  It’s the same click that tells the Pupper its time for us to satisfy our need to seek the spectacular.  Every dog seems to have this desire tucked deep inside.  They love to sniff-it-out.  So do I.  It’s something we can all share.

Thermometer or Thermostat?

“While I was never part of their group, I respected them for the strength they held in their core beliefs.” – Michael Sears

Thermometer or Thermostat? 

“It seems as if all of our institutions have shifted and they’re failing right before our eyes!”  Michael said to me as we were enjoying each other’s company while having lunch together.

I could understand why he had come to such a conclusion as he shared his recent experiences.  At the same time, I was about to experience an unexpected, yet important side-benefit from our lunch-time conversation and it caused me to listen to and explore the idea of, as well as the human need for, belonging more deeply.  

Belonging to something bigger than one’s self, a group or institution, is an important element of what it means to be part of the human family and experience.  Michael’s food-infused stories revealed at least five essential, important tenets of “Michael’s Principle of Belonging,” so I hungrily listened as he fed them to me.

“I never seemed to believe the same things as the majority of others in my childhood community.”  Michael expressed to me, as he began our conversation.  “That was always really hard for me as it made me feel as if I were an outsider.”

He went on to describe more of the personal challenges he faced as a result.

“I know what it feels like to hit rock-bottom.  I’ve experienced such pain personally!  It wasn’t until I came to really understand, and accept, my own personal value that was able to flourish.”  He continued. “Experience has taught me that in in order for a person to be part of something larger than him or herself, the other members of the group have to value them for who they really are.”

That’s the main tenet of belonging to a human centric group or institution.  It is essential to Michael’s Principle of Belonging.

“The next thing I’ve come to appreciate, even though I never held the same core beliefs of my early-life community, is how much I had come to rely on the consistency of the people surrounding me!” He explained.  “While I didn’t share the beliefs of my neighbors, I truly respected them for their, ‘this is what I believe and I don’t care if you agree with me attitude.’  I’ve just recently been able to comprehend what an important stabilizing force their belief-continuity has been in my life.”

That’s Michaels’ Second Tenet.  A person, belonging to any community, has a reciprocal obligation to value the genuine personality of the other members in the group.

Speaking of personal responsibility, Michael said, “I’ve recently discovered my role in that same community!  I’ve become a bridge, of sorts.  There are times when members of our community can’t understand the position of others.  That’s when I’ve found myself stepping in to act as peace maker because I love, understand and value competing ideas.”

Michael’s third tenet is: It is the responsibility of each group member lead out with love.

“It seems as if all of our institutions have shifted and they’re failing right before our eyes!”  Michael said to me, with love and compassion in his eyes, as we were enjoying each other’s company while having lunch together.

When our time together had ended, my thoughts around what he had taught me didn’t end.  I couldn’t quite capture a tie-down, a certain, simple analogy that would allow me to bind all the lessons, he’d taught me, together into one simple, long-lasting, impactful picture.  That’s when I looked at my car’s dash board while preparing to leave the restaurant parking garage on that same wintry, snow-blown day.

First, I checked the outside temperature reading.  When I saw how cold it was, I next turned my hand from the ignition button to the thermostat, just to the lower right, so I could turn it to increase the comfort level in my car.

“Am I a thermometer or a thermostat like Michael?”  I asked myself right after this movement and realization allowed me to internally absorb what Michael had been teaching me.

Adhering to Michael’s Principle of Belonging also means that you and I can also follow its fourth and fifth tenet’s.  People who want to make a difference in the lives of others don’t have the luxury of simply registering changes related to life’s interactive temperatures.  They, like Michael, seize the opportunity, have the ability, and obligation to turn up the thermostat of their love and understanding, so they can make a noticeable difference in their communities and relationships.  If we will, then we’ll make both stronger and they’ll never fail.

Rollerblading Through Life

A young woman rollerblading in an airport terminal.

Rollerblading Through Life

“Did TSA hassle you about those?”  I asked, immediately upon slowing and walking closer to a fellow, young woman traveler.

“No!” The young woman, from Boseman, Montana, said to me.  “I don’t think they have any rules about things like this.  In fact, they’ve made comments about how cool it is.”

Of course, I wanted to know more because of my aching feet and admiration for her creativity.

‘I’m flying between Boseman and Tucson.  I knew I had a long, three-hour layover here, so I thought of a way to have a little fun while waiting around in the airport.”  She continued.

“When I flew in here two days ago, I used my fitness tracker to check the distance from the aircraft gate to rental car pickup and it was a 1.19-mile walk!  Rollerblading that distance would have been a breeze!  You’re the coolest person I’ve ever met!”  I commented while beaming with admiration.

But, my appreciation didn’t stop there.  Here is, perhaps, the more important principle this delightful woman taught me one snowy day, while waiting for a flight in an international airport.

I’ve passed through that same airport six times over the past two weeks and here’s an example to illustrate the story I’ve self-crafted and expressed to others about my experience.

Last week, when overhearing a man and woman ask an information agent how to get to another concourse, he gave them directions with a smile.  And, as you may have guessed, I had to give them a little extra information and advice as well. 

“Make sure you stop to get food and drink before you begin the long walk!  If you don’t, you may die from starvation or thirst before you get to your gate!”

Luckily, they were delightful people and simply laughed at my guidance.  Yet, this conversation with is a perfect synopsis of the story I had made up about traveling through that airport.

We all create such “stories” during our lives.  They build upon each other over time to become thousands and thousands of short stories that combine into one great, whole.  It’s our own unique narrative.  And, that rollerblading, joy-seeking-traveler taught me that our stories can be edited!  It’s our choice.

Here’s what an edited, new story, about my trips through that same airport could have been, had I simply used newly learned “Rollerblading Creativity.” 

“I found the best place in the world to spend time having fun on my rollerblades!  You might not believe it, but a large international airport is a place with the longest, climate-controlled blading corridors ever.  When there, I get to use my waiting time to get exercise, breeze between connections and cruise quickly to the rental car center.  But, perhaps the best part is seeing the reaction of other travelers as they see the ‘crazy’ sixty-something man skating around like a kid!”

While creating this new narrative I was interrupted.

“Paging Lynn Butterfield. Please board now!  This is your final call!”

Upon hearing this I quickly gathered my things and sprinted over to the gate agent.

“Lynn Butterfield?”  He queried.

“Yes!  I’m so sorry!  I was working (writing about roller blading around the concourse) and lost track of the time (because I was having so much fun).”  I replied as the agent scanned the boarding image from my phone.

I walked down the jet-bridge, smiling.  The time I’d spent editing this one short story of my life completely changed my airport experience.  It increased my joy and my spirits.

‘I’m flying between Boseman and Tucson.  I knew I had a long, three-hour layover here, so I thought of a way to have a little fun while waiting around in the airport.”  An amazing stranger said to me a couple of hours earlier.

Thank goodness she was there to teach me about rollerblading through life by editing the short stories, I’ve already created, and will soon write while living a lot more creatively.

Riding to a Higher Place

 

A Farmer’s Field Art

Riding to a Higher Place

The early morning air was, well, it was just plain cold.  It was January after all.  And, the sun was not up yet.  That all added up to a cold, dark walk to the airport terminal.  Even at this early hour I was focused on giving myself marching orders.

“Don’t walk too casually on that patch of ice or you’ll find yourself on the asphalt!”  I muttered as I walked forward.

It was going to be a hectic day for sure.  Not just because I was traveling.  These days It seems as if most days are on the edge of being frenzied.  Sometimes I think it’s just me.  It most likely is. Yet, as I swim my way through most days it seems as if others around me are sharing the experience of being harried.

Perhaps that feeling was being amplified during this particular moment.  I left a little late to drive to the airport.  Then, I walked half way to the terminal before I remembered my face-shielding mask was sitting in my car.  So, I walked back to my car, got the mask, walked to the terminal, put it on and was instructed to remove it, when a TSA Agent wanted to compare my face to the photo on my driver’s license.

Snap!

The ear-bands on that mask, thing, broke as I began to lift if away!

Luckily, the TSA Agent simply smiled, said, “Not a problem!”, and handed me a fresh mask so I could continue on.  Whew!

I made the flight and settled into my seat so I could fret about all the things I needed to get done for the day.  Then, there was a magical moment that changed the way I was going about living for the rest of this day.

A little daily sunshine always goes a long way toward lifting my spirits, so I decided to slide that little window shade cover up, just to let a little enlightenment ride the light into my brain.  And, it just so happened.

There in the dawn, in the dim morning light, as the world was coming alive again, I saw the distinct image of a huge horse in a field below.  There were other field shapes too.  But, this one was not the regular square, rectangle or circle.  Its image was distinctive, divergent, inspiring and made me wonder.

“I never would have seen this had I not been lifted ‘above it all’.  I wonder what other wonders I’m missing by not taking the time to allow myself to be lifted on a regular basis?”

It’s easy to become caught, trapped in the regular.  Caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life.  When that happens, it becomes difficult to see just how magical the world really is.  It’s hard to see how inspiring our universe is if you aren’t somehow lifted out of what you’re seeing on the ground, to a higher vantage point.

There are all kinds of vehicles to take us, you and me, to such a place.  It could be the time you take to create inspiring art, just like the farmer who brings horses alive by growing them as huge murals in the form of a crop.  Or perhaps you like to write?  It might be the time you take to exercise?  It doesn’t really matter what lifts you.  What is important is to find what that thing is and to allow it to give you a ride to a higher place, out of the everyday hustle and bustle, on a regular basis.

The early morning air is, regularly, just plain cold in January.  And, even though the sun was not up yet on just such a day, it was about to rise.  What I didn’t know, as I was walking to the airport terminal, was that I was about to ride an airplane to experience how one farmer’s field-art would teach, anyone who saw it, about the importance of being lifted to a better vantage point.

Imaginable Possibilities

“You’re looking at it wrong!  It’s a rag now!” – Thomas Korcorkov

Imaginable Possibilities

“First thing we need to do is clean this work space.” Tom said to me as we began.

“Okay.”  I said as I walked to the table closest to me.

Once at the table I was amazed at the wide array there.  But, it was one item that caught my attention right off.

“What’s this?”  I scoffed, while holding a white athletic sock that had seen better days.

“Just put it over there.”  Tom replied.

“Tom!  There’s a big hole in it!  If you need new socks I’ll gladly buy some for you.”

Of course, I knew he didn’t need me to buy socks for him. Tom is one of the most talented, successful physicists I’ve ever known.  And, he has more money than most people could ever spend in a couple of lifetimes, because he’s successfully invented and commercialized three or four products that have widely changed the world in which we live.  To simply say he’s improved life for millions would be selling his achievements short.  Yes.  I knew all of that.  What I didn’t know was that his quick response to my snippy statement would forever change my perspective.  

“You’re looking at it wrong!  It’s a rag now!” Tom quipped.

Yes.  This was one of those seemingly innumerable times when I’ve failed to recognize value simply because I didn’t open my eyes internally; to take advantage of my heart and mind’s vision, curious sight, toward imaginable possibilities.  Perhaps this one moment and exchange with Tom was an expression of how differently we think.  If nothing else, it definitely gave me a little more insight into how he thinks and why he’s able to see opportunities which are imperceptible to most others.

Thomas Edison, another of our world’s greatest inventors, said, “When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this - you haven't.”

The memory of Thomas Edison’s words caused me to pause for a second time within a span of five seconds.  It was a pause that allowed me to begin to open-up.  To submit myself to becoming a student.  To blend the words of the two Thomas’ into one, insightful lesson.

“First thing we need to do is clean this work space.” Tom said to me as we began.

“Okay.”  I said, not realizing at the time he was speaking of cleaning the workspace of the mind. 

Once prepared, I was amazed at the wide array of new possibilities to be imagined there.  But, it was one item that caught my attention right off.

“What’s this?”  I asked, as I held up a mind opening catalyst, once used as a white athletic sock and then as a rag.

That’s when I recognized new understanding.  New growth!  The comingled words of the two Thomas’ had guided me toward beginning to see imaginable possibilities.

Tale Lights

“Tale” lights messaging peace and goodwill.

Tale Lights

It was a cold December night.  Luckily, we were sort of sitting snug within the cocoon of warmth created by our car.  In a way, it also felt as if we were trapped inside another cocoon; our restaurant parking stall.  We were getting to know that stall way too well!  That wasn’t part of our initial plan.

The plan was simple.  Go to one of our local restaurants, pick up some takeout, drive the hot food home and enjoy it while sitting fireside.  Yet, upon arrival at the restaurant it was immediately clear that the line for drive-up service was seemingly a length longer than a child’s anticipation for Christmas Morning.  That was much longer than I was interested in.  So, I opted to park, walk inside and carry out our order.  I should have paid a more attention to the length of that line!

As we walked past the lined-up cars again, while carrying our just purchased, carefully packaged food, it was hardly a bother.  And, since the food was hot we decided to enjoy it at its best, right up to the time it was gone.  

When our food was gone, the line of cars was not.  And, it appeared to be growing!  So, there we sat, waiting in hope for an opening to leave, until it felt as if we were beginning to grow too.  Roots!

Fearing an ever-increasing depth to our sprouting roots, I decided to start the car, place it in reverse and prepare to take advantage of a slight opening for an escape.  

I know what you’re thinking right now!  Yes.  I am an unfailing optimist!

You know what holiday-time-traffic can be like.  This scene was that.  

And then, in an instant, it was suddenly not that typical holiday-time-traffic scene! Because, as soon as our backup lights flickered to life, they seemingly triggered a chain reaction of goodwill. The rearview mirror showed the lights of the car behind as they immediately twinkled to life. One. 

Then another. 

Then another.  

And, another.  

Within another moment there was backward creeping!

The blocking line of cars, once moving in a unified, single direction became a bifurcated string.  The cars on my left-rear were stalled, waiting for a voice over the order speaker to offer them hope.  The cars on my right-left immediately offered their own display of hope.

The car behind me nudged to life, creeping back in unison with those to its rear.  And, within the twinkling of more than a dozen backup lights, an escape gap was opened!

I looked in my rearview mirror, checked it twice and then carefully maneuvered into the opening.  Once there I stopped the car and touched a button so the moon roof would slide into its hide-away spot.  I reached my hand through the roof, into the cold air outside and gave a wave of gratitude!

It was a cold December night.  Luckily, we were sitting snug within the cocoon of warmth created by the goodness of strangers.  The plan was simple.  Go to one of our local restaurants, pick up some takeout, drive the hot food home and enjoy it while sitting fireside.  

Yet, rather than watching the flicker of flames from a fire, our hearts feasted on the flicker of “tale” lights messaging peace and goodwill.