Handicapped?

“All of us have the time and ability to do what we really want to do!  Even those of us who have bodies that can’t do what they used to be able to do.” – Jeffrey Smith

Handicapped?

We had just finished a long, large meeting in a hall that held about 400 people.  I had the good fortune to be sitting next to my good and long term friend Jeff.  At the end of the meeting he got up to greet another attendee, and I noticed a flash in his eyes.

“I know that look!” I said to myself.  It was the look Jeff gets when his pain is on the edge of unbearable.  It made my heart hurt, but I stood there waiting for him because I wanted to have a brief conversation.

When he finished I asked him if we could talk for a minute.  He turned toward me and then began to drop lower so he could relieve his burden.  I saw the same flash.  This time it was more pronounced.

“Are you alright?” I asked.

“Oh, sure.”  He answered.  “I just keep moving a long.”

“Speaking of moving along, I wanted you to know that I did as I told you I would.  I met with our friend over the telephone this week.  I have to tell you, she’s really full of anger!”  I said, continuing our conversation.

“Why did she say she’d move forward if she knew she wasn’t going to?”  He queried.

“I don’t know, but I’m not giving up on her yet!”

Then Jeff looked at me and thought deeply for a moment.  “She knows she doesn’t have much time left.  But, she’s spending her last months in the wrong way.”  He openly told me.

His comments took me by surprise!  I didn’t know she was going to die soon.  I was operating with the mistaken belief that her physical woes were behind her and that she was doing well again.  I wasn’t keeping up with her situation as well as I thought I was!

“You know, I remember very clearly the day my life was changed due to injury.  I went into surgery and had seven vertebrae fused!  I could do nothing.  At least that’s what I thought.  But, it wasn’t the truth!  Sure there are physical things I can no longer do, but I can still do everything of importance.”  Jeff paused and looked right into my eyes.

“All of us have the time and ability to do what we really want to do!  Even those of us who have bodies that can’t do what they used to be able to do.”

I must have had a funny look on my face because he continued to teach me.

“You know I really mean we all have the time to do the things that are really important, if we want to.  I can’t play games that my body can’t handle, but I can still wrap my arms around my grandkids.  I can still reach out to give others help.  I can give everyone around me love.  That’s not to say I’m the best administrator around.  Lots of people have more organizational ability than I do.  But, nobody has the ability to care about other people more than I do.  What I give to others is just me.  Just Jeff.  And, I happy with that.”

I’ve known that Jeff has physical challenges the entire time I’ve known him.  I’ve always been able to see the pain that never ends in his eyes.  But, because he is always “just Jeff” I’ve never considered him to be handicapped in any way.

He’s like hundreds of others I know as a result of my work at Special Olympics Utah.  He makes me ask myself, “Am I the one who is handicapped?”  Have you ever asked the same question?

You and I are the only ones who can truly be ourselves, do what we really want to do, be who we were meant to be.  Are you handicapping yourself?