Moosages of Trust

A ferocious storm

Moosages of Trust

The grass all around me was dark green, thick, and tall.  It should have been.  It was spring and the weather had provided an almost perfect pallet for ardent growth.  Some of that weather was now raining down on me in a torrent, driven by high winds.

The wind blew the leg of my trousers up just enough to cause a shiver from the striking of cold hail on my bare skin.  My pants were beginning to soak through.  My coat was beginning to soak through.  I was cold!  I knew my cows were cold as well.

The best way to keep cows warm and healthy in adverse weather is to keep them well fed.  That’s why I was out in this wild, grass promoting weather.  I wanted my cows to be as comfortable as possible.  The weather report had warned me that the worst was about to arrive.  At this very moment, drenched and icy, I was finding it hard to believe it could get much worse.

In such weather conditions cows can become quite skittish.  I’ve seen them race across a field in seconds or buck and jump as if to demonstrate a fervent defiance.  I’ve always found them to be passionate, curious creatures.  That’s why I was approaching them with exceptional caution at this stormy moment.

You might say I wasn’t throwing caution to the wind.  I had no desire to have eighteen hundred pounds of beef to launch me skyward to be ravaged by the wind like a rag doll.  After all, my largest steer is capable of bending a metal pipe, based in concrete, at his whim.  And, last I looked; I was still mostly skin and bone.  All of which, I wanted to remain in tact.

At the moment, I was still all put together; in tact, and the welcome I received by the steers was one of calm confidence.

As I walked into the hay barn calm enveloped me.  I was protected from the rain, wind, sleet and hail.  I lifted some hay and braved back into the torrent.  I wanted my furry friends to receive the same protection so I intended to feed them in a different than customary location.

I walked out.  They followed.  They ate comfortably.  They stayed within the protection offered.  Their behavior caused me to really consider the moosage they were giving me.  

Here is the communication my cows gave me about building and maintaining trust.

Be consistent.  I’ve tried to feed them at or near the same time and place twice, each day.  That’s why they were waiting for me at their feeding rack, even when the weather was dreadful.  They knew I’d come at that time, at that location.  They were so certain of it that they had left the protection of their warm, dry stable in advance of my arrival.  Consistency makes a difference, especially during times of adversity!

Bank your time.  Trust isn’t earned over a short period of time.  I’ve spent months and years with these cows.  They’ve been able to observe me over a long time.  So, they know I have their best interest at heart because I’ve proven it to them time and time again.  They could have been very upset because of the intemperate weather.  They could have run away or hurt me badly because of an imperfect circumstance, but they didn’t.  They knew I would lead them to safety, so the followed.  They had spent enough time with me to be certain of my motives.

Create a comfortable relationship.  I’ve worked to develop my relationship with these cows on many different levels.  The sound of my voice, my touch, my smell, my movements, the taste of their food have all become part of how we interact together.  When I approach them I call out in voice as a welcome.  When I’m close, I reach out and let them sniff my hand.  To reassure them, I rub their heads, sides, and backs.  I stand and do these things as they eat so they associate all of my movements with the pleasure of being fed.  I’ve made it comfortable for them to be with me.

You and I can use these same Moosages of Trust in all of our relationships.  If we will, those around us will enjoy a high level of confidence.  Remember to be consistent, bank your time and create a comfortable relationship.  It will be worth it; because all of us will need to endure many storms in life!

Four Youth

Landon’s First Birthday

Four Youth

Some people are young when they become grandparents.  Some people are not.  Am I speaking of chronology here?  You might think so.  And, I’m sure you understand that almost no matter how one looks as age, chronology generally has something to do with it.  For example, April is Landon’s, my grandson, first birthday.

I wanted to be with him to celebrate his very first birthday, so I traveled across North America to be there.  After all, a first birthday is a day of increased significance if only because of its position.  It is first!  We often use “first” as a measuring stick throughout our lives.  And Landon’s first birthday is a measure of significant progress. Celebrating it with him taught me about measuring age in ways beyond the numbers.

Landon is young!  That fact is beyond dispute.  But, how about you and me?  Are you and I young?  Perhaps we’re not chronologically, but you and I can use Landon’s four measurements of living a youthful life as a guide to determining our non-chronological age.

Vision.   Landon is just learning to walk.  That means he is anxious to explore.  His eyes drink the world in and he rushes to explore everything he sees.  I found him examining everything he could see, touch and taste.  As I watched him I soon found that I had become blind to much for my surrounding world.  Who knew that the fireplace in his family room had small stones in its base?  Landon!  People who live in a youthful way have a broad and detailed vision of the big, wide world right down to the tiny and seemingly insignificant.  They use that vision to explore everything around them with excitement and energy.  Their visionary approach to the world prepares them to become more.

Preparation.  Landon has taught me that preparation is pursuing the now and new.  Most of us think of preparation as shoring ourselves up so we can manage whatever unknowns are thrown at us.  Yes.  That is true.  And, it is having the ability to overcome personal fears by engaging in the world now, while exploring the new.  It’s the way a person begins to have increased capacity, by becoming filled with the surrounding infinite.

Practice.  Living with infinite possibility requires resilience, which is another way of suggesting practice.  Landon follows his inner voice to keep moving. It prods him forward no matter how many times he falls.  He walks, crawls, and climbs, over and over again.  Then, as if by magic, he masters another skill.  His desire for practice is far stronger than any internal fear or trepidation.

Risk.  Because Landon uses the entire world as his practice field, his view of risk has been transformed.  It has transformed him into a risk taker.  I’m not talking about being a daredevil here.  I’m talking about engaging in the world around you and me.  Landon isn’t worried about what other people think.  He’s busy being focused on exploration.

He’s exploring the world around him, how he fits in it, what he can learn from it and how to interact with it.  He understands that the real risk is the risk that comes from a lack of growth, the absence of risk.

If a person’s living is absent of any one of Landon’s four measures of youth they are at risk of aging.  Are you at risk?  Are you an old grandparent?  Are you an old parent? Are you just old?  Perhaps you’re old in a young body?  Would you like to feel youthful again?

Incorporate Landon’s First Measurements of Youthful Living into your way of life and see if the combination will allow you to begin to measure your age beyond the numbers Four Youth! 

Buying Bigger Shoes

The passing of an American Hero

Buying Bigger Shoes

I’ve heard the term, “The Greatest Generation,” for most of my life.  And, honestly it didn’t have a lot of impact on me until, perhaps, the greatest hero I’ve ever personally known from this generation passed away very recently.  His loss has caused me to really stop and think about the attributes this man displayed before my eyes for more than thirty years.  Perhaps you and I might consider incorporating one or two of his traits into our own way of living.

First, he never considered himself to be a hero.  I call him an American Hero.  The truth is he is more than that.  After all, he and his contemporaries liberated the entire world from others that had already subjected large areas of our planet to their ruthless rule.  He, along with others, stood up and gave their all to restore free choice.  And, while that’s impressive, and earned them the title of hero, they didn’t stop there.  He didn’t stop there either.  Ever! 

Second, he never puffed out his chest and took credit for saving the ability for future generations to make their own choices.  He said, “We were just doing what we needed to do.”  His life was never about him!

Third, he was always focused on the small things.  He didn’t spend his efforts working to stand in the spot light.  He always kept his head down and his eyes fixed on the all-important details.  I never saw him miss one detail.  In fact, he would study an issue for hours and hours until he felt he understood every aspect and its ramifications.  When I would question him such exhausting effort he would reply with, “I guess I’m just more conservative than most.”

Forth, he never considered any kind of work to be “beneath him.”  He had the means to hire people to do lots of menial work around his home.  He took pride in completing the smallest tasks.  And, I never heard him complain about having to do so.  He made a conscious choice to do things that others felt were “beneath” them.

Fifth, he always put his loved ones first.  He would play dress up with little girls and attend sporting events for the sake of his grandsons and granddaughters. He was there whether it was convenient or not.  He never complained about the heat, location, or lack of comfortable seating.  He was focused on being there for the ones he loved.

Sixth.  He was a rock!  When the world was “crumbling” around others, his world was not crumbling.  He made the concentrated effort to make sure his health, work, home and finances were on secure footing.  The world was a safer place because of him!

Now he’s gone!  And, suddenly the world looks much larger and a whole lot scarier because he’s no longer here to protect you and me.  But, if we will incorporate what he taught us deep into our own characters he’ll, and the others of his generation, will still be with us.

We’ve lived with the greatest generation.  We’ve known them.  Let’s not forget what they’ve taught us.  Perhaps such remembrance, along with concentrated action on becoming who they taught us be, will allow us to carry on their legacy and fill their shoes.

I need to buy bigger shoes!

Face-to-Face

The Former Mayor

Face-to-Face

We were friends.  We were of different political persuasions.   And, he taught my daughter and me the lesson of a lifetime. 

It all started as my daughter was visiting me at my office.  The Mayor also worked with me there and when she saw him she wanted to shake his hand.  So, we walked over and I introduced her to him.

He was generous, as always, and took her hand in a friendly manner and said, “Nice to meet you.”

My daughter responded with something like, “You’re in the wrong party!”

I have to tell you that at that very moment, I was quite worried about how my friend would react to her statement.  But, I had nothing to fear.  I watched as his faced softened even more and he became gentler than I had ever before seen him.

“I think we believe in the same things.”  He said as he bent toward my young girl.

“Do you think people should be free to so the things they want to do?”  She replied.

“I believe that!” He kindly said.

Then she continued down a list of principles in which she believed and he replied to each in the same tender way. Finally, he said, “Isn’t it great to know we have so much in common?”

We both shook his hand warmly as we departed.  Now all three of us were friends.  Our manufactured labels no longer mattered.  They would never matter between us again, all because this man was kind, gentle and sharing.  He looked at us face to face and taught us that we had more in common than we supposed.

Something important happens when we engage with each other eye to eye.  It allows us to see emotion, authenticity and softness.  Meeting person to person establishes the fact that we naturally share a significant baseline, humanity.

The Former Mayor became more than a public figure to us in a few moments because he responded to a little girl’s comment with humanity, gentle communication and compassion.  He will forever be our friend.  We know who he is.  We know what be believes.  We know he is more like us than any label would suggest.  He changed our lives face to face.

We can all change each other’s lives by following his example.  Let’s talk with each other person-to-person, face-to-face, in gentle tones so we can discover that we have much more in common than difference, so we can become friends.