Guide Dogs

Two Dogs

Guide Dogs

There are two dogs living with me.  One is a pure bred “Door Step Breed” (a dog who shows up on your door step and stays until they’re invited in to the family) and the other is a long hair Corgi. We try to take great care of them.  We feed them right and give them exercise every day. 

One of my daily jobs is to take these frisky pups for a walk each morning and night.  When we started walking together, my mind believed I was doing it just for them.  After all, who would want to take a walk just after waking in the morning and about one hour before going to bed?  But, a couple of mornings this fall began to shift my vision.

We were walking not long before sunrise when I looked up at the bright stars in the sky to drink them in.  As I gazed up into the star-sprinkled sky I noticed that three of the brightest stars were in a unique orientation.  I was witness to a fairly rare planetary alignment of our solar system and enjoyed its wonder for a little more than a week, until the planets began to drift out of line again.

This display was just the beginning of my vision changing experience.  The belief that I was walking only for the benefit of my pups began to be transformed to a new point of view.  I was beginning to watch for beauty I would otherwise be missing and I wasn’t disappointed.

Just three days ago I was walking into a bright pink, cloud enhanced sunrise that took my breath away.  And, if that wasn’t enough, as I turned to make my way back home, the pink display shifted, before my very eyes, to brightly highlight the towering snow-capped wilderness peaks just to the west of my house.  It was magnificent!

My dogs have shown me their personal magnificence in another way as well.  I found myself looking very carefully at them, the other day just to make sure they weren’t sporting watches, as they seem to instinctively know when it’s time for us to go outside together.  Because when it’s time to out, they come directly to me and give me “the look.”

I used to interpret “the look” as a statement of, “It’s time for you to take care of me.”  But, now I realize its correct understanding is, “We’re ready to help you live a better, more healthy life.   Let us show you the spectacle just waiting for you, if you’ll allow us to be your guide!”

I always thought of guide dogs as those who helped people whose eyes didn’t function.  But, my dogs have taught me that even people who have perfectly functioning eyes don’t always see well.  I’ve needed them to open my eyes in ways I never would have considered.  They’ve guided me to a better life, a life filled with increased health, wonder and love. 

They’re true, guide dogs.

Land of the Brave?

What can we do? – Michael Sears

Land of the Brave?

I had been working throughout the day.  It was so busy I hadn’t had the chance to hear any news, until the evening when two of my daughters telephoned me.

These two daughters are a very attuned to watching for terror and possible terror.  They both live in New York City and are aware, first hand, of what it means to be frightened by others who attack the innocent en mass.

“Did you see the news of France?”  Both daughters asked.

“No.”  I replied.

They went on to give me the details of what they knew.  All I could do was listen.  And, when asked what it was we could do I said, “All we can do is move forward in faith.”

The next morning I had the opportunity to spend some time “catching up” with my friend Michael Sears.  We discussed lots of things, but the conversation turned to current events again and Michael asked, “What can we do?”

At least I had been thinking about that very question for about a day, so I had a slightly better answer.

“Each one of us needs to make the decision to be a better person.”  I said.

He looked across the table at me and his face told me he wasn’t sold on my answer.  We talked about it more.  He still wasn’t convinced.  That’s ok!  We’re still great friends and always will be.  He’s exactly the kind of man I was talking about – he has a good moral foundation, he’s hard working and is always thinking about ways of helping others.

Still, he thought my solution was too simplistic.  Perhaps he’s right.  But, I can’t help but think that one, multiplied by three hundred million is three hundred million.  It is no longer simply, one.  If we all decide to change ourselves into our vision of our very best self, then nothing can stop us from creating a world free from the fear of terror and full of promise for every individual.

When we are successful individually, perhaps this time, we the people will be transformed into the greatest generations the world has ever known.  What can we do?  Only you can answer that question for your self!

Wrong Turns

“You make a lot of wrong turns!” – Craig Kamis

Wrong Turns

I was walking through SEATAC with my wife the other day when she made the comment, “I expected you to be better at navigating airports than you are.”  The funny thing was that I hadn’t been in SEATAC for many years and thought I was doing well!  Perhaps I’m just used to making wrong turns.

As we walked along through the concourse, my mind traveled south to San Diego where I had received a similar comment from a colleague while working there more than thirteen years ago.  As we were driving to another meeting destination he looked up from the passenger seat at me and said, “You make a lot of wrong turns!”  So, it’s been documented, from at least one other source, that I’ve been making wrong turns for a long time now.  Interestingly, I’ve never viewed it that way because I’ve always been able to get where I was going.

Because I’ve always been able to reach my destination I’ve just adopted the view that my process is one of resourcefulness.  By resourceful, I mean I’ve had an address or a destination in mind and I just keep making turns until I get to the right place.  I may not be the first one there and I may make the people who are with me a little crazy, but I can always count on myself to get to my desired location because I keep trying.

This concept of “keep trying & keep turning” is something you and I can keep in the fore front of our minds when we’re feeling a little discouraged about where we find ourselves financially, physically, occupationally or even with our relationships.  As long as we try to make good decisions and keep acting to become who we want be, we’ll be successful.  Making small adjustments in what we do every day will add up to great things in the end.

Alexis De Tocqueville, a French political thinker and historian best known for his works Democracy in America and The Old Regime and the Revolution, wrote, “But what most strikes me in the United States is not the extraordinary size of a few projects; it is the countless numbers of small ones.”  He thought of the United States as a great nation as a result.

So, yes, you and I do make lots of wrong turns.  And, some times we don’t navigate our way through very well, but if we keep making countless numbers of small turns, aimed in the right direction, they’ll all add up to our benefit in the end. 

Keep trying. Keep turning. Thinking in this way will cause you to soon view yourself as being resourceful and successful.

It Started With One Crazy Dog

My Friend Barry

It Started With One Crazy Dog

“I rescued this dog from our local pound and he’s turning our lives upside down!”  Barry said to me over the phone.

My friend Barry is a financial and investment expert.  And, it was at that point where his entire life seemed to begin to unravel.  He started having problems with his back and had surgery twice to try to get it repaired.  Then he had surgery on his eyes to correct his vision and was almost blinded as a result.  Then the final straw, keeping his personal life together, broke as his wife left and their marriage ended!  But, that wasn’t the end.

His business was struggling because of his personal problems and it finally collapsed in bankruptcy. Talk about challenges!  I was concerned for him and worried that his life would never provide him with the joy and success he deserved.  I unfortunately lost touch with him about that time, eight years ago.

Then, while working with Tony, a common friend, I was able to receive an update.  Barry had worked through his two back surgeries, gotten his eyes fixed and married a wonderful new companion.  He also rebuilt his business into a thriving enterprise!  I was thrilled to hear of his regained successes and the lessons he learned.

Sometimes it appears as if our successes in life are all disappearing quickly and when such struggles descend we have a tendency to believe that we’ll never find success and joy ever again.  Unfortunately, such a belief can become a pattern of continued discontent, gloom and despondency.  But, no one need live in such a pattern.  Barry is living proof.

When talking with Barry he explained that even though he was literally tortured during his worst of times, he believed he could turn it all around one step at a time.  “At first, I just made an agreement with myself that I would do my physical therapy every day.  When the pain began to lessen I added one other small thing to accomplish on a daily basis.  Focusing on small progress encouraged me and allowed me to continue forward while building confidence.”

Speaking of building personal confidence Barry said, “Just do one thing you’re good at every day.  That alone will help you feel encouraged.”

When you’re life feels as if it is turned upside down remember Barry and what my Uncle Truss said to me once. “Things will turn around for you again.  You can count on it!”

Barry even got to the point where he could count on his dog again.  A few visits with a good local trainer got both of them straightened out.  That too teaches you and me something else encouraging. 

There are times when it’s helpful, necessary and important to reach out to others for help.  Not one of us can be successful on our own.  We need to be surrounded by people who can help us make progress.

Barry put it best, “Working with a crazy dog made me look deep inside to discover areas where I needed to improve personally.  While it appeared as if my problems all started with that crazy dog, I soon learned, from him, that I could live a happier life if I just made a few small positive changes and got some help.  Now, I’m glad to say that my new, improved life all started with that one crazy dog!”

That Moment

“She just hasn’t had her moment yet.” – Mark DeAngelis

That Moment

It was one of those moments for me.  I looked out of the window of the restaurant and saw my friend Mark DeAngelis.  I was truly glad to see him.  You see, it wasn’t long ago that he had heart surgery and I worried that I may never see him again.

I was pleased to see how wonderful he looked and asked him to tell me how things went as soon as we sat down at the table.

He told me about the process he went through as he discovered he had a problem with his health and then he talked me through the details of getting ready for surgery, his experience in the hospital and his recovery.  I was eager to hear about all of it.  But one thing in particular really made a distinct impression on me.  It was about his discovery of “That Moment.”

“When I was getting ready to go in to surgery my doctor said that if things didn’t go well I’d never wake up again.  That’s when my life changed.” Mark explained.

“Most of us go through life acting as if our life will never end.  We spend our time worried about things that don’t really matter.  I was with one of my closest friends the other day and she was upset over something inconsequential.  I told her not to sweat the small stuff!” 

Perhaps what impressed me the most was what he said next.

“She just hasn’t had her moment yet.”

He was a little wistful as he spoke. I could feel nothing but love as he went on.

“When you have ‘That Moment,’ it changes your life forever.  You clearly understand what’s important and what’s not.  I just happen to have had my personal transformation.  So, I know what it’s like on the other side of such an experience.  I tell people about it, but for most it remains an elusive principle to understand.”

His genuine caring and compassion acted as a guide to me and allowed me to better understand.  I could see his new way of looking at the world through his eyes.  I could feel the strength of his heart as he poured it out to me. 

Having “That Moment” caused Mark’s heart to be recovered in two ways.  He is physically strong.  But, most importantly his “heart” has experienced a reformation and he longs for you and me to experience the same.  Could this be “That Moment” for you?

A Broken Body

Carol Abbott Butterfield

A Broken Body

I have always known that people learn a lot from their parents.  But, it seems as if almost all of the focus, I’m aware of, is how much we learn from our parents during our “formative” years.  These are a person’s young years, generally believed to be somewhere before the age of six or eight.  And, these years are indeed important.  They create a foundation for a person’s life in many, many ways.  But, over the last few years, and especially the last couple of months, I’ve been able to receive a new bolster to my own foundation for living an abundant life.

This new strengthening came upon me in an unexpected way, in an unexpected form.  The form was that of a broken body, my mother’s.

I learned many things from my mother during the course of my life, but perhaps not nearly as much as I learned from her as I saw her wither right before my eyes.  Looking back, I can remember visiting her in the hospital on several occasions as she was being treated for fractures in her spine.  She was in immense and continuous pain for her last four years or so, yet she never gave up hope.  She never stopped working to get better.

When her heart began to fail she could no longer take care of herself.  We surrounded her as a family and provided her with love and the best care we could obtain for her.  Still, she would gasp for breath, desire to do more for her self, and act as if she was just fine.

We all knew she wasn’t, just fine, and felt helpless as we watched her pain increase and her strength drain away.  Had we been able to remove her struggles and make her whole again we would have done so.  But we couldn’t.  She battled on with bravery and encouragement for all to receive.  And I received a lot.  When I visited with her I was constantly amazed at her strength of character.

That admiration continued right up to the night, two days before she passed away.  She and I sat next to each other talking well into the night.  It was just the two of us and of course, she was asking me about the welfare of my three daughters.  We remembered our times together with fondness and she reassured me of her love for all of us.  When I told her that my daughter Kilee was going to have her first child she simply beamed at me and said, “You’ll be a wonderful Grandpa!”  I’ve never seen her so happy.

Unfortunately her life ended a short two days later.  But, the lessons she taught me over her last days, months and years burn bright in my memory.  A broken body could not keep her from teaching me the real meaning of perseverance, internal strength of character, the importance of keeping a healthy sense of humor, optimism, and the value of enduring love.

May we all follow her example by living a life time of formative years!

Wrestling in a Mirror

Two telephone calls from John.

Wrestling in a Mirror

I received a call from a close friend and client just a couple of days ago.  As soon as the conversation began I could tell it wasn’t going to be an easy one.  In fact, after about three minutes of listening, I was finally able to get a calming word in.

I’ve known the caller, John, for a long time and he is one of the most kind and clear thinking people I’ve ever met.  He’s always been a great friend and we have a wonderful relationship.  But, during our phone call his demeanor was much different than it normally is.  My only hope was to simply show him loyalty and love so he could comfortably return to himself.

My experience is that the most difficult struggles we face in life are internal.  I’ve never wrestled with anyone who has given me more difficulty than I’ve given my self.  As I listened to John, I could tell that he was having the same experience.  Luckily, I knew that John is a man of great internal strength.

Internal strength is a hallmark of good character.  It is the beginning of all personal greatness.  It makes right-minded-thinking, morality, good habits and productive life possible.  It is also the catalyst for the development of wisdom and personal wellbeing.  And, at the moment of our conversation, John was truly consumed by worries related to his wellbeing.

There can be no failure when it comes to expressing love to another person.  It is the great softener of hearts.  Showing ordinary love always produces extraordinary results.  The simple act of sincerely offering missing information, giving personal praise and confirming individual loyalty opened the door for John to stop wrestling internally so he could regain his true nature toward the end of our conversation.

As our exchange ended I was filled with an overwhelming peace, wonder and gratitude.  I felt at peace because John was going to be able to accomplish what he truly needed to have happen.  I was filled with wonder because I felt as if I had been wrestling with a mirror.  I could recall so many times when I had lost my own internal strength and felt as if there was no way for me to become my self again.  Finally, I felt tremendous gratitude for the realization that there is indeed no failure when it comes to expressing love to another person, even to your self when you are a mere reflection of the person you truly are.