"Collision" 8.18.2025 Monday's Warm Cocoa

“Collision is the intentional, rapid, and often unplanned convergence of diverse people and ideas.” – Jeff Amerine

Collision

My friend Jeff Amerine is extraordinary. He’s an expert in venture capital and entrepreneurship and is particularly distinguished for his work in building business startup ecosystems in non-traditional locations. Locations commonly referred to as, the “fly-over” states. Those not on the east or west coasts of the United States. 

He is the co-founder and Managing Director of Startup Junkie Consulting, a firm dedicated to accelerating small and scalable businesses in America’s Heartland. He’s also veteran of the United States Army.  You know, one of those guys who have created, protected and maintained the life you and I enjoy. These two life experiences have given him a unique view of business and life.

One of the concepts he developed and uses in his life and business is a principle he calls “Collision.” Not the kind of collision one thinks of occurring as a result of a car crash. Yet, it is of comparatively, high impact. Collision, as he defines it, is the intentional, rapid, and often unplanned convergence of diverse people and ideas. In the context of a startup business, this means creating an environment where founders, mentors, investors, and potential customers interact frequently to test assumptions and get real-world feedback. It is a process of constant "bumping into" new perspectives and challenges, forcing a startup business to either pivot and grow or fail quickly, saving valuable time and resources.

This same principle can be powerful for you and me to accelerate personal growth. It is a transformative method of moving from passive living to active experimentation. In other words, instead of spending months or years in a state of indecision or uncertainty, you can use the power of collision to accelerate your own learning and development.

A key application of collision is in embracing what could be called unstructured networking. Traditional networking can feel like work, a series of pre-planned, formal meetings that you really don’t want to attend. Collision, however, encourages a more natural approach. For example, you could attend a conference of interest, join a local meetup group related to a hobby, or volunteer for a cause that interests you. The goal isn't just to add names to your contact list, but to expose yourself to unexpected ideas and conversations, leading you toward chance encounters, often providing extraordinary insights, while steering you toward a new direction you hadn't considered.

Additionally, collision can redefine your concept of failure. In the startup world, a product that fails to gain traction isn’t necessarily seen as a complete disaster. It's viewed as a data point. Similarly, when you apply collision to your personal life, you can consider setbacks as valuable feedback, a learning opportunity. This shift in thinking allows you to move on quickly, analyze what went wrong, and adjust your approach for the next attempt.

Finally, the collision principle pushes you to accelerate your learning curve by prioritizing action over deliberation. If you're contemplating a major life change, such as a career transition or a move to a new city, instead of spending months in a state of anxious analysis, create small, low-risk collisions. This could mean taking a long weekend in a place you’ve often thought of living, to meet locals and explore different neighborhoods. Attend a workshop of interest. Try a new hobby. Such hands-on "collisions" provide a much more authentic and immediate sense of whether a path is right for you, allowing you to move forward with clarity and purpose.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TjKNEZ1QUTxoBXRqghc9Oiwz4-adE6ke/view?usp=sharing

More Than Enough-Monday's Warm Cocoa 8.11.2025

"My 16-year-old son dropped some wisdom on us.” – Brad Alexander

More Than Enough

“Last week my sixteen-year-old son dropped some wisdom on us while we were out at dinner,” Brad Alexander said.

His son has dyslexia. So, reading is torture for him. It always has been. As a result, Brad and his wife have always been worried about him doing well in society and with school work. But, the other day he received the score for his first-ever AP class final test, and he made a four out of five! That’s college credit level stuff! In high school.

“Several of his friends scored lower than him,” Brad before continuing. “Here’s what he said about the test that made me a pretty proud dad.”

“I think being dyslexic actually helped me. I had to focus way more in class than my friends, and I think it helped me learn better.”

Did you catch those three personal deductions?

Brad’s son has discovered something most people have yet to.

The things that make life harder for you might actually be your secret weapon! Another way to say this is, your most difficult challenges are likely to lead you to your greatest successes and growth, if you allow them to.

Brad’s son struggles with reading. And he's a terrible at spelling.

Brad said, “I used to worry about him constantly.”

Three questions constantly haunted Brad and his wife as their son grew physically, mentally and intellectually through his childhood years. 

Would he keep up in school? 

Would others be mean to him?

Would he be okay?

Brad says, “Turns out I was worrying about the wrong things!”

And, he was kind enough to tell me what he has learned from his son through his years as his father.

First, we are all dealt cards we don’t want or don’t expect.

Second, how you play those cards matters way more than what cards you’re dealt.

Brad’s supposedly handicapped son is the embodiment of a powerful principle of great importance. Our biggest struggles might actually be our greatest advantage. They will always shift our minds to seek different answers and alternate paths forward. Paths and answers that we would never have considered otherwise.

You and I just have to learn how to turn everything to our good. It is a learned skill!

Pretty smart for a sixteen-year-old who would have a hard time reading this story!

As parents, we worry our children and grandchildren won’t be enough. But, maybe they’re already more than enough.

We all worry that, we won’t be enough. 

Maybe we all are.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TjKNEZ1QUTxoBXRqghc9Oiwz4-adE6ke/view?usp=sharing

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa, "Stuck in Neutral"

“I believe my plans have become stale.” – Ed Stokes

Stuck in Neutral

“I believe my plans have become stale,” Ed’s message said. “I’m not sure if there is any strategy to help overcome this.”

Ed’s lament sounded familiar. After all, who hasn’t had an experience of feeling as if they’re stuck in neutral? But, Ed had decided, enough is enough.

For the past two years, Ed has been talking about moving to a mid-sized city in the South, a place holding his attention due to its vibrant community, lower cost of living and temperate climate. Yet, the real draw to that particular location is his family, already living there.

Ed's voice, usually a calm and steady baritone, was frayed with anxiety as we talked on the telephone moments later. “I can’t seem to make any progress!”

As Ed talked It became clear that there was something deeper not being acknowledged.  

"I need to ask you something, and I want you to be honest with me," I started with trepidation. 

"Sure, what is it?" he responded, with a note of acceptance in his voice.

"Why are you deciding not to move forward?" 

There was a thoughtful silence on the other side of the phone call as Ed began to let the question resonate.

“Why have you been deciding not to move forward with your plan? You’ve been holding off for two years and based on your anxiety level it’s clear that you’re paying a high cost by living with such uncertainty. Don’t you think it is time to put an end to this? Tell me the reasons you decided to go forward a couple of years ago."

Ed took the next few minutes to rehearse the factors that caused him to create a new plan for his future.

“Have any of those compelling reasons changed?”

Ed responded firmly. “No!”

“Then it’s time for you to just get it done and finished!”

The feeling on the call changed instantly as soon as Ed’s intent had been refreshed. He began planning again on the spot. Most importantly, he began to act. The barriers he had identified earlier melted away instantly because he changed his thinking. He had shifted the gears in his mind from neutral to drive again.

It is impossible to live in “drive” all of the time. Sometimes a temporary shift to neutral is needed. After all, moving forward with purpose requires a solid plan based on intent. Ed just got stuck in neutral this time.

Ed discovered his sought-after strategy, to shift out of neutral, by simply reclaiming his “why.” 

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TjKNEZ1QUTxoBXRqghc9Oiwz4-adE6ke/view?usp=sharing

"Lifetime of Wisdom," Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 7.28.2025

"Whenever we would get together I made sure I had my notebook and it always seemed as if I could hardly transcribe her advice quickly enough.” - James Griffin

Lifetime of Wisdom

The early evening was upon us and it was Monday. That meant being able to get together with my friend James Griffin, during the weekly gathering of our service-organization. My sighting of James from across the room was magnetic, causing me to weave around tables, chairs and people to reach him. Once we were face-to-face, our conversation seemed to naturally advance to “centenarian-learning” and his cherished memory of one client in particular.

One of James’ over one-hundred years of age client, a woman with crisp mental abilities, grabbed him by the elbow as he walked with her out of his office. 

She pulled him in closely and asked, "Are you happy with your life?"

The question caught James off guard just a little, even though he was used to having astute conversations with this long-time client.

“Yes. As much as I can be,” James responded.

“Then, that’s the only thing you can ask of life,” she responded with a twinkle in her eye.

While relating this experience to me James had an out-of-time, far-off look radiating from his eyes as he said, “Whenever we would get together I made sure I had my notebook and it always seemed as if I could hardly transcribe her advice quickly enough.”

There was a slight pause in our conversation as James mentally rehearsed additional centenarian-friend wisdom he felt to share.

“Make sure you continually make new friends,” she had advised before going into greater depth. “As you age, you’ll find that some of your friends will pass away. Others will move away. Some will simply fade away as a result of life changes; divorce, other interests, job changes. Things are always in motion for everyone.”

James has made a home for her shared wisdom. It fills his heart with warmth as he recalls his interactions with her. I could feel that warmth radiating from him as he recounted more of what she passed on to him.

James’ centenarian-friend never spoke with him about achieving his every dream, accumulating vast wealth, or experiencing constant euphoria. She spoke of finding peace, joy and contentment through love-based personal relationships. She always spoke of the benefit of accepting personal imperfection, celebrating all small victories, and recognizing that true happiness isn’t a destination. It is a state of being, cultivated daily through friendship.

“Are you happy with your life?” I asked myself, as my friend James and I turned our attention to the now starting service club meeting.

“Yes,” I thought, while savoring the words of James’ wise, twinkling-eyed centenarian friend.

“Then, that’s the only thing you can ask of life.”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/10lWDbZ2E-NYvRciiXMglVSo0XJfB6Ask/view?usp=sharing

"A Long Wait" Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 7.21.2025

“If I lose him I will be most devastated. He is all I got at home and my cat.” – Joseph Davies

A Long Wait

The sterile scent of antiseptic hung heavy in the air, a stark contrast to the familiar, comforting smell of Joseph’s dog. He sat hunched in the waiting room chair, its plastic cold beneath his over-heated jeans. His clutched phone tight in his hands. It felt like a lifeline and a burden all at once. He’d just sent me a text, a hurried, raw outpouring of fear, and now the silence of the vet’s office amplified his anxious thoughts as he awaited my reply.

“If I lose him I will be most devastated. He is all I got at home and my cat.”

Just an hour before, Joseph’s world had imploded into a frantic scramble of fear and soiled carpet. Buster, his beloved Golden Retriever, had been fine, or at least, "fine" as far as Joseph knew. Then a seizure juddered Buster’s entire body. A sudden, violent tremor shook Buster's large frame, followed by an unexpected gush of urine which saturated the living room carpet below. Joseph scooped him up. Buster’s familiar muscular frame was now terrifyingly limp. The drive to the vet had been a blur of frantic prayers and choked-back tears.

Now, Buster was behind the closed doors, framed in perfect view from Joseph’s seat, in the hands of strangers, who were now evaluating his condition using the language of pet-science. Joseph kept rehearsing the seizure scene as he sat there. Buster's eyes had been, wide with confusion as his legs flailed with spasms. The image was seared into his mind in a painful loop.

A young woman with a nervous terrier on her lap glanced at him sympathetically. Joseph offered a weak, tight-lipped smile in return. All speech was caught in his throat. There was a lump of dread making it impossible for him to talk, even if he knew what to say. Buster wasn't just a pet; he was Joseph’s steady beat of life in his otherwise solitary home, a fixture of unwavering companionship. Buster and Mittens, a quiet cat, were his constants, anchors in a world in which he often felt adrift. The idea of losing Buster was creating a black hole inside his chest. He tried to push the thought away, to focus on the faint sounds from behind the door.

Minutes were dragging as if heavy and thick molasses. He looked at his phone for my response to his message.

“I'm so sorry to hear about that. I've been through that kind of thing with my own dogs. I hope he gets well soon! Please keep me updated.”

At least my message allowed Joseph a brief break from his frenetic thoughts before he was once again consumed, worried about Buster feelings of confusion and fear. He just wanted to hold him, to tell him everything would be okay and take him home.

Finally, the door opened. The veterinarian, her face kind but weary, stepped out. "Mr. Davies?" she said softly. Joseph shot to his feet, his heart hammering against his ribs. This was it. The moment of truth. He braced himself, ready for whatever news she held.

 His long wait was over and his house would remain a home for three!

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/10lWDbZ2E-NYvRciiXMglVSo0XJfB6Ask/view?usp=sharing

"Chosen Community" - Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 7.14.2025

"I can’t see how they could ever leave here.” – Maxwell Johns

Chosen Community

The late afternoon sun, a familiar golden hue, slanted across the university quad, illuminating the buildings of Southeast University. For Sarah and Mark, this campus wasn't just where they studied and worked; it was where their story together began and continues.

They met during freshman orientation, two wide-eyed eighteen-year-olds navigating the jumble of a new beginning. Sarah, with her quiet intensity and a mind already buzzing with scientific curiosities, was captivated by Mark's easygoing charm and infectious passion for baseball. He was a promising baseball player, she a budding scientist. Their first date was a study session that morphed into hours of laughter over lukewarm coffee. Following the roar of ballfield crowds, after Mark’s home run record shattering college ball career, and the quiet triumph of successful research studies for Sarah, they graduated hand-in-hand, diplomas clutched, with their hearts already committed to an intertwined future.

They married shortly after graduation. It was a joyous celebration attended by many of the friends they’d made in school. Then, after spending four years as a professional baseball player, life, in a serendipitous turn, brought them back to their alma mater. 

After a stint as a successful manager in minor league baseball, Mark was invited back to Scissor-Tailed Flycatchers baseball as assistant coach. Sarah, having completed her Ph.D. and a postdoctoral fellowship, secured a research position in one of university's cutting-edge science labs.

Their careers were flourishing, but it was their growing family that truly brought their world into vibrant focus. First came Lily, a whirlwind of energy, then Leo, a sweet, curious soul. Raising two young children while maintaining demanding university careers could have been overwhelming, but Sarah and Mark have a secret weapon, their Southeast University community.

Their friends, many of whom were now professors, administrators, or local business owners, formed a connected, supportive village. When Mark has an away game, or is out of town on the recruiting trail, a friend, whose son received batting instruction from Mark years before, volunteers to come to their rescue to care for the kids. She’s acknowledged as a cherished member of the family, by the kids and their parents, as a grandmother. And, she’s always there when Sarah has a late-night experiment going over-time.

Sarah’s dad, Maxwell, in town for a few days talked with me and said, “you would not believe the number of people visiting that household. They have such deep relationships and support that I can’t see how they could ever leave here.”

The kids are thriving, growing up surrounded by a diverse group of loving adults who are not just friends, but extensions of their family. Lily loves spending time at the baseball facility with her dad and the players. Leo seems to always be held in someone’s arms. Sarah and Mark rarely feel the strain of childcare, instead experiencing the joy of shared parenthood within a community they cherish. Their social calendar is packed, not with obligations, but with genuine connection. Their lives are a testament to the power of community. 

They’re a couple who have found a flourishing life, thanks to the enduring embrace of a chosen community.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/10lWDbZ2E-NYvRciiXMglVSo0XJfB6Ask/view?usp=sharing

"The Benefactors," Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa, 7.7.2025

"We always seem to have people who need help come into our path.” – Donita Nelson

The Benefactors

Daniel and I spent a few minutes looking in and around my car searching for his cell phone. Even with the two of us scouring high and low, we were unsuccessful at spotting it. Our joint failure ended with Daniel making the pronouncement that he would drive for the next hour and a half to go back to the place he last remembered seeing it. Steel Canyon, a deep mountain canyon with a river running through it. 

He decided to jump into his truck and drive immediately, to race with the sun so he could get down the steep winding road before the sun blushed no more. Steel Canyon Road was ever more difficult to navigate in the dark and he wanted the natural light so he could search along the dirt-river-bottom-road, where he had earlier leaped from my car in an effort to escape the potential sting of a huge red hornet. The road I was taking was safer; a wide and smooth interstate freeway, and thinking it wouldn’t take me long to complete my drive was both, right and wrong.

It was right because it only took about ten minutes before taking the final turn toward my driveway. I was wrong, because as I took that last turn, at a very slow speed to navigate the abruptly changing elevation, I watched as the sleek metal and glass silhouette of Daniel’s cell phone drifted down the windshield until it rested in the wiper crevasse. I stopped dumbfounded; eyes wide and mouth agape.

I couldn’t call Daniel! After all, I was in possession of his phone. So, I drove back to his hotel, went to the front desk concierge, and asked her to give it to Daniel upon his return. He called me about three hours later.

After rehearsing “the sliding incident,” and apologizing for not being able to reach him before he drove all the way back to Steel Canyon, we laughed together before Daniel verbalized his distinctive character.

“It was important for me to go. There was a family stuck on the side on the canyon road that needed my help!”

That was two years ago, before Daniel married Donita, and he texted me with a renewed invitation.

 “We’ve been wanting to give a restaurant a try,” Daniel’s message said, causing me to read with a smile.

I smiled again as I read the address. It was just the sort of place Daniel and Donita Nelson would choose, an out-of-the-way joint in the middle of nowhere. And, I laughed as the warm memory of the Steel Canyon adventure with lunch in an historic café rebounded in my mind.

We were the exclusive patrons of the Wildflower Café upon our arrival. We listened to our server recite the day’s menu and placed our order before Donita began another tale as a tantalizing appetizer.

“We always seem to have people who need help come into our path,” she began.

Daniel and Donita then painted a verbal picture of them traversing a lonely country road where they ‘happened” upon a young man who had crashed on his bicycle. Donita, a nurse, knew how to treat him, but didn’t have her medical bag. As they were wondering what to do, a man suddenly appeared, who happened to have an EMT medical kit, containing just want Donita needed to treat the young man’s injuries. Which she happily did.

I was enraptured by this new paralleled story and wondered what description perfectly equals the continually compassionate Daniel and Donita. 

“The Benefactors!”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/10lWDbZ2E-NYvRciiXMglVSo0XJfB6Ask/view?usp=sharing

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 6.30.2025

“What if I have regrets later?” – Gabe Chariton

Formative Importance

Gabe’s thinking wheels were turning. He had formulated a question about his financial future. That question was spinning in his mind. He was processing information over and over again. Yet, he was doing more than processing.

Processing could be a practice of rehashing the same old thoughts. That wasn’t what he was doing. He had considered his current position and was using it to gather additional intelligence. I knew he was assembling more data, because he asked me to give him some analysis. That’s why we were sitting together, talking through the facts, before hitting golf balls, on a bright Thursday afternoon, in a bay at the local Top Golf. 

That’s where I witnessed Gabe’s formative thinking progression.

This wasn't just a financial transaction for him; it was a deep breath at a pivotal crossroads. Gabe understood, with a quiet certainty, that this choice would be formative. It wasn't merely about the immediate cash or a perceived potential, distant windfall; it was about weaving the very fabric of his financial and core beliefs together, shaping his relationship with risk, and laying the groundwork for every significant money decision he’d make for years to come. Would he prioritize the comforting embrace and security of retiring all his current obligations, or the one who dared to dream of exponential growth, trusting in a possible long-game phantom? 

Gabe’s next question was, “What if I sell that property and its value increases tremendously over the next few years?” 

“May I make a suggestion?” I answered.

“Yes. Please,” Gabe responded.

“Will you please tell me what is most important to you right now?”

After thinking for a few moments Gabe said, "opportunity cost is not just in dollars, but in the precious currency of peace of mind. Being debt-free isn't just about the financial ledger; it will free up my mind. It will allow me to think clearer, to explore future ventures with a lighter heart, unburdened by the hovering hammer of debt. The potential future appreciation of the property, while a lovely thought, is really like a distant, shimmering star. I’ll think about it over the next couple of days and we’ll talk again.” 

Gabe’s thinking wheels still were turning. Yet, I had witnessed a shift in his thinking from unproductive rehashing to formative importance. He was now focused on the tangible, not on a nonexistent future.

“It’s critical to determine what is most important to you,” I said. “It will allow you to act now, without the worry of regret in the future. That’s why I call it formative importance. It confirms what you really want now, so you can build a path forward without remorse.”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/10lWDbZ2E-NYvRciiXMglVSo0XJfB6Ask/view?usp=sharing

"Strengthening Hands" Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 6.23.2025

“I’m 56 years old and should be doing this by myself,” - My Friend's Daughter

Strengthening Hands

Three of us were sitting at a dining area table together. It was the first time for me to meet my friend’s daughter. She’s not a young girl. She turned 56 years old not long ago.

Her father is no longer a young man either. He’s 83 and still watching out for his daughter. That’s why he wanted to get some additional, outside help for her. She’s been unemployed for a few months now, with building financial woes, and sometimes it’s hard to have difficult conversations with people who are close to us.

“Please tell me what is going on with you now,” I asked her, while already knowing a little bit about her situation as described by her father.

She took a deep, emotion-filled breath and began to fill-in the blank spots of her current financial situation. One of those spots was filled with what could be characterized as “the elephant in the room.” A mammoth issue that was about to crush her, along with her financial future for many years to come. And, it could be avoided with a little bit of short-term help, so I took a deep breath and launched right into the hard question.

“Do you have someone who’s able to help you through this rough spot with a little loan?”

“I’m 56 years old and should be doing this by myself,” she responded quickly.

It was an admirable, but unrealistic sentiment which she explained by launching into all of the reasons no one else would be willing to help her get past her current position. Luckily, there was another “elephant” sitting in the room, right across the table.

“I can loan you the money,” her father immediately offered.

“I can’t let you do that,” she replied.

“Why not?” I retorted. “You will be able to return the money in about 90 days and he’ll hardly notice it was gone because of the fast turnaround.”

That’s when tears began to stream from her eyes. She answered with a hiccup voice reiterating, “I’m 56 years old and should be doing this by myself.”

“It will remove the immediate urgency facing you,” I said gently, as relief began to wash across her face and over her body.

Sometimes relief is hard to find on your own. Especially when thinking you’ve reached an age of maturity. Yet, every one of us will likely need the strengthening hands of willing loved ones from time to time. It can be a hard ask! It can also be accompanied by easy, obvious help from someone who cares about you deeply. Maybe it’s the intimate nature of possible supporting help that makes asking so hard. But it’s worth it.

Over the next few minutes we created a path forward and put the wheels of progress in motion. Forward progress came quickly, with joyful relief. It was a respite made possible by strengthening hands.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

"Sprinting for Dad" Monday's Warm Cocoa 6.16.2025

Fans cheer as a little girl runs to her father after a baseball victory.

Sprinting for Dad

When thinking of American baseball many connections come to mind. Summer, hot dogs, peanuts, a seventh inning stretch and a group singalong of “Take me out to the Ball Park” are certainly some front-of-mind thoughts. Yet, a new, inspiring connection played out, the other day, in a college ball park at the conclusion of one particular NCAA Super Regional baseball game.

The host and winning team of the baseball game gathered in the center of the infield to celebrate their win. They were surrounded by joyful reverberations, intermingled with music floating from the still-full stadium as players, coaches, managers and fans cheered and applauded each other. After-all, it had been years since they’d enjoyed such a victory. This win qualified them to compete against seven other teams in the 2025 College Baseball World Series. Thousands were blissfully focused on baseball success, until a concurrent happening played out.

A young toddler sitting in the right field stands had waited patiently for the end of the ballgame. She had waited almost four hours to reach her own envisioned victory. Her dreamed for victory was different than that of all other spectators celebrating in the stands. Her only interest in the baseball game was that it would be over, win or lose. So, as soon as the game ended and the team gathered in the infield, she could no longer be contained.

With one quick, decoy move this toddler shimmied away from her mother and set her sight on reaching one person on the field. She ran to reach the arms of her father, a coach for the winning team.

The girl’s run began in right field on small, churning legs at the edge of the warning track and picked up speed and attention as her feet hit the grass. The crowd caught sight of her streak not long after she hit the grass. One could her a slight roar begin to build as fans noticed her intent.

The growing roar continued to rise to crescendo until her father sees her, scoops her up in his arms to capture her love and in one smooth twirl, lifts her to victory position on his shoulders. One small girl had successfully shifted attention from an unforgettable baseball victory to a remarkable winning of viewing hearts. Perhaps such winning of the heart is evidence of the importance of having a loving father and a foreshadow of more love to be shared on Father’s Day, happening a short week and a half, from her victory run.

It was a run that, from now on, whenever I think of baseball, will cause me to reminisce and smile, as I recall one little girl’s baseball-field-sprint into the arms of her beloved father. 

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

"Unimaginable" Monday's Warm Cocoa, 6.9.2025

“I received an unimaginable gift as a result of my accident.” - Susan Edgmon

Unimaginable

“I was in a horrible traffic accident,” Susan Edgmon began. “The immediate result was an unimaginable, life-altering brain injury.”

For a performance-oriented entrepreneur, Susan’s new, brain injury reality was devastating. Her entire life and her imagined future vanished instantly. Or, so she believed.

“My recovery team focused on getting me healthy and moving forward. They worked patiently, asking me to set new goals. I didn’t want to! But, I finally surrendered and told them my goal was to learn drive again,” She said with a grin.

Susan was in psychotherapy twice a week for two years. Her recovery was not a brisk stride of process.

“My condition, after the accident, forced me to sit a lot. For the first time, I watched oak tree leaves sprout and open, over days,” Susan said with a pleased smile. “I was a workaholic before the accident. I had never experienced life or the world at such a pace.”

Susan’s mother hoped to encourage a more engaging pace of life, so she called and asked her to take a water color painting class. 

“I said no! I don’t paint,” Susan said laughingly.

Her mother responded by saying, “I paid $60 for the class, so you’re going to go!” 

“The first day of class we painted only brown! The second day we painted a sunset,” Susan said in a mocking tone. “The teacher asked me how long I’d been painting. I told him, this was my second painting. He said, no, really! How long have you been painting?”

From that point on, Susan continued painting, learning and exploring varied art forms. She entered a local art competition and as a result, a gallery owner approached her about having a show in her gallery.

“I soon found that as a creative entrepreneur, you need to do a lot of different things just to survive financially. It’s not easy,” Susan said of her life as an artist. 

“I’ve always remembered what my friend and mentor, Sam Walton once said to me.” 

“Find a need and fill it,” Sam advised her.

Susan has focused on Sam’s advice faithfully. She has found an unimagined need, within herself, and has filled it beautifully by sharing her artistic gift with others. 

“My art is the gift of my accident. I have received it, so I need to share it! It isn’t something I’m supposed to keep to myself. I must share it,” She explained. 

I asked Susan, “What advice do you offer others who are still seeking their own gifts?”

She responded quickly by saying, “I would say, believe! You don’t have to be perfect. Just do the best you can and that’s enough. Your self-worth is not tied up with how you perform. Always ask yourself, what did I learn, even if you fail. Because you learn, whether you fail or succeed. Be patient and keep trying. Keep trying different things. Keep learning. And, seek your joy.” 

Imagine the unimaginable for yourself.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharin

"Angel High-Five" Monday's Warm Cocoa, 2 June 2025

"No explanation." – Traveling Mother

Angel High-Five

The end of the Memorial Day weekend proved to be a little hectic for our household-guests as they began the process of finding all of their belongings. I looked at the once bulging, huge pink suitcase. It was practically empty, as were the other smaller bags that had all arrived three days earlier. Upon arrival, they were all filled.

Now, mother and father were scurrying about, picking up the clothing, binky’s and all sorts of other items, while stuffing them back into the quickly filling bags. I filled one bag.

The bag I filled was small zip-sandwich bag. I crammed it with, prior-to-three-days-ago untasted, glazed animal cookies. These particular grandchildren had never enjoyed this delicacy. Now that they had nibbled on those tasty-crunchies there was no going back to a quiet domestic life without them! (Yes. That’s what grandparents are for.) Such inspiring tranquility could not be left alone in a dark cupboard when they’d be sorely needed on the three-and-a-half-hour flight soon to face this family of four. Now, it was time for me to complete the last task facing me in preparation for their departure.

We loaded everyone and everything into my car and began driving to the airport. It was a large load. I wondered how only two parents could transport all that stuff and two kids to the jet bridge.

My daughter was fearing the same as she asked, “Do they have skycap service at this terminal?”

“They don’t,” I responded with trepidation.

“Oh!”

The conversation had ended. The concern had not. And, the ride was completed shortly thereafter as we arrived at the departure curb.

We stepped from the pavement to the curb and sidewalk over and over again. We lifted bag after bag, setting them on the sidewalk. Then, we got the strollers out and carefully secured the kids. My work was done and all I could do is watch and wonder again, how they’d get to the bag check counter with all that stuff. 

We gave hugs all around. I got in my car, pulled away from the curb slowly and watched as a man suddenly appeared next to that just-stacked, pile of luggage and humanity; seemingly out of nowhere.

It made me wonder. So, as soon as I arrived home I sent my daughter a text message.

“I saw the guy come out to help you into the terminal. How nice! What was his story?”

“Just nice. No story. No explanation. Just an Angel. High-Five!”

“It was wonderful,” I responded with slightly trembling fingers.

Memorial Day is a day when many of us have trembling fingers and watery eyes. It’s a day set aside to remember those who sacrificed their lives on our behalf. Such sacrifices continue daily and we often don’t give our benefactors a thought now, or a remembrance later. Here’s to every one of you good-deed-doers!

Angel-High-Five. Thank you.

 _________________________________________

I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

"Transformation," Monday's Warm Cocoa, 5.26.2025

"We have hundreds of volunteers making this possible!"

 – Ashley Wardlow

Transformation

“We’re, first and foremost, an educational organization,” Ashley Wardlow, Executive Director of the Botanical Garden of the Ozarks explained as we walked the butterfly pathway to their Butterfly Garden.

As our walk began, person after person came up to Ashley to speak with her about something an idea they were excited about. They were all volunteers who were clearly, deeply and personally invested in this garden. Ashley greeted each one personally with a broad smile, and gave them her full attention as she listened. Her smile never wavered.

“We have hundreds of volunteers making this possible!”

As we arrived at the Butterfly House I spotted a little basket, on a small side table, at the entrance. There were small plastic bags, each containing a butterfly or a chrysalis. The bags had been placed there with great care.

“What are these?” I asked.

“We host more than 6,000 students on field trips each year,” Ashley replied. “The students and others in our community scour the area gathering them. Then, they bring them here to be placed in the Butterfly House, where they’re safe and can transform. In the early summer, the chrysalis emerges as a butterfly. It is the most magical place then and for the rest of the summer! The butterflies are happy and thrive here, because of nectar producing plants we have inside the house.” 

After spending a few minutes of enjoyment, absorbing the wonders of the Butterfly House, we headed back to the hubbub of their Chefs in the Garden event; a showcase and competition between some of the region’s best chefs and their restaurants. It’s the Botanical Garden of the Ozarks annual spring fund raiser. So, soon we walked the same butterfly pathway past a large butterfly sculpture, located on the south side of the path. And, once again a myriad of people came over to speak with Ashley.

“She is the embodiment of the butterfly pathway,” I said to myself. “She plants eggs with every conversation.”

Those eggs had transformed into individual chrysalis, who had changed into beautiful butterflies, who were now fluttering all around us, with beauty in their wings. They are the ones who had and will continue to transform the surrounding garden into something greater that plants, animals, and insect residents. They have created a flourishing community.

I was marveling at Ashley and the way she orchestrates all of it, through her joyful caring, listening and educating. Her work floats on butterfly wings and bedazzles with her beckoning smile.

“No one who comes here can leave without a smile and a heart filled with happiness,” Ashley says.

I believe her and believe in her. She is the living inspiration of an amazing, ongoing transformation of nature and people.

__________________________________________ 

I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

"The Giver," Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 5.19.2025

"He’s always helping us, when we’re the ones who are supposed to be helping him!"

 – Darian Harris

The Giver

It was “Demo Day” for the Fuel Accelerator last Wednesday and perhaps it was serendipitous that it was being held at the new Heartland Whole Health Institute. But, the serendipity was just beginning to be unveiled, as Darian Harris loped up, in his larger than human stride and smile, to say hello.

“Andrew Bart tells me that your new Fuel Cohort in Phoenix is going very well,” I said, knowing that Darian was a key contributor to its successful launch.

“Yes!” Darian responded before continuing on with, “He’s always helping us, when we’re the ones who are supposed to be helping him!”  

“That’s who he is,” I said while adding. “I’ve never met anyone who knows as many people and is constantly and happily connecting them to others in an effort to be helpful!”

As those words left my mouth I remembered recent research that reveals how telomeres, tiny bits of DNA, can reduce stress while lengthening life. And, yes, this connection between telomeres and Andrew Bart came to me, while standing in the Heartland Whole Health Institute!

Scientific studies show that specific individual practices can help slow the deterioration of and even lengthen telomeres, potentially slowing down aging and improving overall health. The best news is that, unlike treatments such as Botox and facelifts, these don’t come with much of a price tag. I won’t go into the details of each research suggested practice, just the first one, the personal practice of helping others. After all, it’s the trait that Andrew has fully assimilated into his life. 

It can also be called the characteristic of compassion and fostering social connections. 

Research studies have shown that when elderly people are given something as simple as a plant to care for, they live longer. And many studies continue to make the point that helping others helps all of us individually.

A study from the University of Wisconsin found that people who practice loving-kindness meditation increased their telomerase activity, through an enzyme that helps maintain telomere length.

Showing compassion to others, as well as ourselves, lowers stress hormones like cortisol and triggers positive physiological responses in the body. When you and I practice self-compassion or offer kindness to others, we feel calmer, more connected, and less stressed, which helps reduce the strain that stress puts on our bodies.

Best of all, you and I can start receiving such benefits immediately by practicing small acts of kindness each day, whether it’s offering a kind word to a colleague or sending positive thoughts to someone you care about. 

I’ve decided to call such small acts, “Andrew’s-micro-moments of giving.” Because when you give to others, life gives right back to you and your health, just like Andrew, The Giver.

______________________________________________

I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

"Angels Around Us" Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 5.12.2025

"Excuse me sir, have you seen my brother." – A stranger

Angels Around Us

"Excuse me sir, have you seen my brother?"

The older man was caught by surprise. He didn’t know this approaching boy who was about ten years of age, dressed in his soccer uniform.

“He’s dressed in a soccer jersey. It looks like the one I am wearing, but it has a stripe across here,” the boy continued, while using his hands to identify where the stripe would be, had it been on the jersey he was wearing.

The man listened intently, as the distress in the boy’s face and voice were clear.

“I was asleep in the car,” the young boy continued. “When we got here my brother woke me up and told me he was going into the store and that he’d be back soon. That was a long time ago. Will come into the store with me to look for him?”

“It’s a big store and it is very busy today,” The man replied. “It’s busier today than it was at Christmas time. If we go in there and begin to look, he’ll likely come out of the store and we’ll miss him. If that happens he’ll be worried about where you are. I think it is best for us to wait for him by your car. Do you know where your car is”

The boy responded with a “yes” and the two of them walked to the car, which was parked not far away.

“I’m afraid,” The boy said with tears beginning to glimmer in his eyes.

“Would you like me to wait here with you until your brother comes back so you aren’t alone?” The man compassionately asked. “I remember being your age and feeling alone.”

“Yes, I would like that,” the boy said in gratitude.

So, the two strangers stood by the gun-metal-gray van waiting together. The boy was relieved to have someone with him, but he still tipped up on his toes with a stretched-look, anxiously seeking his brother every minute or so.

“Does your bother have a phone?” The old man asked as a way to relieve the anxious boy.

“Yes.”

“Do you know his phone number?”

“No. My mother does, but she is visiting her mother today, because tomorrow is Mother’s Day.

The man followed with, “Did you play a game today?”

“Yes,” the boy responded earnestly. “We won and I played well. “My brother is our coach.

Silence followed for another ten or so minutes.

“I’m sorry this is taking so long,” the boy said anxiously.

“There is no place I’d rather be right now,” the man gently replied.

The boy’s face relaxed as a result.

“I’m happy to be here with you until your brother comes out,” the man assured him while both sets of eyes stayed fixed on the store’s exit.

Then, with a sudden burst of brightness gleaming from the boy’s face, words of relief resounded.

“There he is!”

Man and boy stood conjointly, tracking the cart-pushing-twenty-year-old’s progress toward them. They stood united until the brother was fairly close.

“Thank you for waiting with me,” the boy said in gratitude, as he locked eyes with his cherub.

His eyes were communicating, “I’m glad you were here to be my guardian angel.”

_________________________________________

I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

"Every Version" Monday's Warm Cocoa 5.5.2025-Lynn Butterfield

"Every house I lived in while growing up is gone."

Every Version

“I told my wife that even if we lost everything, except each other, we would be just fine.”

Jon Buckner pulled up a blue velvet covered chair to the table, while beginning to talk. He had just finished a phone call with his wife. They were discussing the challenges they faced in their dog grooming venture.

“We’ve been having such a hard time finding people to work in our business. Sometimes it feels as if we’ll never be able to get over that hump,” he said, before taking a pause and turning more philosophical about life. “I’ve lived here my entire life and I’ve done many different kinds of work. I’ve built houses, been a surveyor, a mechanic and seen much of the world as a designer, all while living here, in this place.”

When Jon was a young boy, this place, his home town, was much smaller than it is today. In fact, earlier in the day, one person who had not been in the town for twenty-five years commented that it wasn’t even the same place then, as now. There are thousands of more people. There is construction everywhere and opportunity is abounding now as compared to that quarter century-former-self.

“Sometimes it’s just hard to remember the way things were when I was growing up,” Jon reflected while describing his past. “When I was a boy, if we were lucky enough to be living in a double-wide mobile home of questionable condition we felt grateful.”

His description deepened as he when on to say, “Every house I lived in while growing up is gone. You know that condemned, boarded-up white house just off of east Central Avenue? It was my home for a while. When I lived there it seemed to be made of nothing but asbestos and dust. But, we were happy, because we were together and we had a roof over our heads.”

There was determination in his voice and a steel-like-strength shining from his face as he rehearsed end-part of the conversation he had just finished with his wife. He had told her that things would work out fine for them, even if their “extra things,” the things that provide them with additional comfort, such as their Escalades, were to go away they could still be very happy, and perhaps even more so.

After all, the life he used to live, the one currently dancing across an invisible stage, up front in his memory as he was story-telling, transmitted certain peace and joy into his present.

“I’ve done many things throughout my life. I know how to work in different vocations. I’ve had less and I’ve had more. And, the thing I always keep in mind is that I’ve had happiness in every time and every version of my life.”

_____________________________________________

I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

"Inspiring Proximity" Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa 4.28.2025

"Where you stand and who you stand with will quietly shape the person you become."

Inspiring Proximity

“When people talk about success or happiness, they often focus on effort, ambition, and goals.

But over time, I've learned something quieter and just as powerful. Proximity matters,” Harry Fredrickson explained.

“The people we spend time with, the environments we place ourselves in, they build us, without asking for permission. They carve paths in our thinking, set our expectations, and silently raise or lower our standards,” He continued.

While listening to Harry, I realized that many people don’t understand this principle. And, they won’t until they live and experience the gifts of inspiring proximity personally. It was revitalizing to listen to Harry share his own experience.

“Years ago, I found myself stuck. I had dreams, ideas, energy, but everything around me felt heavy. Conversations were filled with complaints. Dreams were spoken about with a kind of distant regret. I was living in a culture of settling, even though nobody said it out loud,” Harry said.

He talked about how, at first, he thought he could resist it. That he was strong enough to stay ambitious and hopeful, even when his environment wasn’t.

But slowly, almost without noticing, Harry recognized that he had begun to shrink. Think smaller. Doubt faster. Finally, he found himself accepting much less from life, as well as for himself.

After years of struggle Harry increasingly came to a significant understand. “It wasn’t my ambition that failed me. It was my proximity to places that didn’t feed my spirit and to people who had quietly given up.”

This realization caused him to seek change and implement a plan to correct his “awful” situation. Experience had taught him that change didn’t happen all at once so, he started with one decision. Live in inspiring proximity.

He began spending time with people who were still building, still dreaming. People who didn’t just talk about ideas, but lived them.

“I found spaces that inspired movement. Places where the morning light through a window could make you believe in second chances,” Harry said of his plan. “The difference was immediate. Not because life became magically easier. But because I was no longer swimming against the current of my surroundings. Growth, ambition, and hope were now normal, even expected.”

Harry confirmed my belief in and about inspiring proximity. “It doesn’t scream. It whispers. It shapes you while you aren’t paying attention.”

When you’re around people who believe in becoming better, it becomes harder to stay small.

When you're in environments of beauty, it becomes harder to live without gratitude.

So, whenever you feel stuck, the first thing to check isn’t necessarily your work ethic or your motivation. Check your proximity. And ask yourself, “where am I standing. Who am I standing with?”

Because effort matters. Dreams matter. And the soil you grow in matters just as much.

"Where you stand and who you stand with will quietly shape the person you become."

Choose carefully. Move closer, to inspiring proximity, and let it do what it does best. Help you grow.

_________________________________________

I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ktZfblXh2jAyKce2-EJazGOdQnaERL3A/view?usp=sharing

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa, "Universal Assistance" 4.21.2025

“Most people think that these kinds of events are simply serendipitous. But, they’re not! I’m convinced that the universe puts the right people into our lives, at the right place and time.” 

- Chris Peterson

Universal Assistance

It was early in the evening and a Startup Junkie group had gathered at Bauhaus to socialize, have dinner and drinks. My friend Carl Maloney was the first to offer me a greeting. 

“I had coffee with Chris Peterson this morning,” he said cheerfully.

“You’re kidding,” I replied. “What time did you meet with him?”

“We got together at 10 a.m.,” Carl said.

“I met with him at 8,” I said with a slight chuckle.

It, would perhaps, seem to be a single serendipitous circumstance to someone jumping into the conversation without additional background. Yet, singular serendipity wasn’t the whole story here. It would take me another day and another conversation with Chris in order to recognize more and broader connections. But for now, my conversation with Carl continued.

“Chris told me that he was having some issues with data. As you know he has three or four businesses and each one is having a data management issue. So, we’re going to meet again to talk about how I can help him solve those data challenges,” Carl continued, without going into more detail about his full conversation with Chris.

Chris is an early riser, so I wasn’t too surprised to get a text from him at about six-thirty the next morning.

“Would you guys like to have dinner with us tonight at June’s at about 6?”

I responded with a quick “yes” and we met at 6 for dinner in the appointed place.

As soon as we were seated Chris opened a conversation with, “Carl and I had coffee yesterday.”

Then, he went on to tell me about his nephew who lives in Texas and how much he likes to mountain bike. “My nephew wants to get a job building mountain bike trails,” Chris explained before continuing with, “Carl loves to mountain bike and when we talked yesterday he told me he knows of a guy who owns a company that builds trails all over the country! He’ll be making an introduction for me soon, so my nephew can schedule an interview for summer work. And, by-the-way, Carl is going to meet with me to see if he can help solve some of my business data issues.”

Chris then made an attention getting, noteworthy statement.

“Most people think that these kinds of events are simply serendipitous. But, they’re not! I’m convinced that the universe puts the right people into our lives, at the right place and time.”

Chris’ words made me pause and remember having, another similar experience earlier in the week.

I was sitting in my office working, when for some reason I looked out of the right window, at exactly the right moment, to see a friend walking by. I was needing to discuss a couple of details about some important work he’s doing for me, and there he was! So, I jumped up and went out to visit with him.

With my attention back in the moment, I responded to Chris’ observation and statement with, “I’m pretty sure you’re right, and Carl would agree.”

I looked out of another window. It was again evening. This time it was the restaurant’s window, beyond Chris’ left shoulder, and said to myself, “Universal assistance is out there! I think I’ll just keep looking for it!”

___________________________________________

I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery. 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MYFyXlDwN-fc35VXcwo-Fza_bVNWEong/view?usp=sharing

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa, 14 April 2025, "Begin"

“You’ve got to start with what you’ve got.”– Robert Rodriguez

Begin

Robert Rodriguez’s movie studio is a vast place. A place where ideas take shape, and movie pitches come to life. When I say come to life, it’s because the lessons of creativity he’s discovered, over more than ten years, are aptly relevant to every person and every life.

Robert is a legend. You may know him as the creator of the Spy Kids series of films. He’s someone whose career and family life has always been transforming and inspirational. From the groundbreaking El Mariachi to his low-budget indie films, Robert has built his life around creativity, not cash. Perhaps that starting place could be called the beginning of more than film making. He’ll tell you it has also become his philosophy of fatherhood.

“Working with my children on projects has brought us closer together and deepened our relationship in ways I never could have imagined. I’ve been blown away at what my children are capable of. They’ve moved way beyond me in so many ways.”

Had he waited for the perfect time begin collaborating with his children he never would have started. 

“You’ve got to start with what you’ve got. Don’t wait for the ‘perfect’ moment or the ‘perfect’ resources. When I made El Mariachi, I had $7,000, no crew, no fancy cameras, just an idea. I had to get creative because that was all I had. And that’s what forced me to think outside the box, to tell a story with limited means. Creativity doesn’t come from having more; it comes from working with what you have and making it work.”

You start small, with what’s in front of you, and you build from there. Your circumstantial limitations are actually what force you to come up with the most innovative ideas. It’s all about making the most of what you’ve got.

“That’s the key,” Robert explains. “When you’re creating with the intent to innovate, the rest seems to fall into place. The work you’re afraid to make, the one you think might fail, is often the work that will connect the most with people. They’re not looking for perfection, they’re looking for honesty, for something real.”

The true creative process happens when you’re willing to step out of your comfort zone, to experiment and fail and learn. If you’re stuck in doing the same thing, in the same way all of the time, you’ll stop evolving. But if you allow yourself the freedom to try something new, you’ll discover your passion. Starting is like punching a ticket to receive.

You can only receive new inspiration by starting, looking and receiving more as you go. It is a freeing process, because the act of starting with what you’ve got precludes other paths and gives you focus. 

“It makes it easy,” Robert says.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MYFyXlDwN-fc35VXcwo-Fza_bVNWEong/view?usp=sharing

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa, 7 April 2025 "Moved"

“They want to hold our furniture hostage!”– Debbie and Leon Madewell

Moved

The music was pounding, making it virtually impossible to hear anything else. Yet, something else was tickling my ear. So much so, that I decided I should pull the phone from my pocket and look at the screen. That fortuitous look and the conversation that followed moved the course of the evening as well as the celebration.

“The movers didn’t show up today!”

I could feel the tension radiating from my friend Leon Madewell’s voice, as if we were in a nuclear reactor. Leon and Debbie had hired a moving company, found on the internet, several weeks earlier and had paid a sizable deposit. Everything appeared to be moving ahead smoothly until the movers didn’t show-up, offering a promise they’d come the next day.

“When they didn’t show,” Debbie, Leon’s wife, said, “I decided to do some additional background checking. Many former clients have expressed horror driven frustration, saying that once this company had picked up their furniture, they held it for ransom, demanding an additional ten-thousand-dollars to release it! We need your help!”

Moving is always an unmooring and emotional experience. An experience which is hard enough, without adding extortion to the mix. So, with one finger in my right ear and my phone held to my left ear I left the celebration music behind while walking out of the ballroom, thinking.

My thoughts walked back to a conversation with Marty Buchanan, about nine months ago. He told me of Erika Young and made a quick introduction. Marty is a business broker and his clients have worked with Young’s Moving Service on many occasions. He’s one of my most trusted advisors, and I knew, like Marty, she’d do everything possible to help Leon and Debbie.

“I’ll text you my friend Erika’s number,” I spouted out breathlessly. “Call her as soon as possible, because it’s getting late. If anyone can help you tomorrow, she can.”

My call with Leon and Debbie ended and they called Erika at about 6:00 pm on a Thursday night. She answered the call!

And, how she answered! 

The next afternoon Leon answered quickly when I called.

“Hi Leon,” I said as soon as he said hello. “How’s your move going?”

“Erika send a bunch of guys! I couldn’t believe how many came on such short notice. They’re unloading the last few items from the truck now! They do amazing work.”

The tension was gone. Leon and Debbie were comfortable and relaxed. The change from nuclear to calm was a moving. Not only was their furniture moved, they were emotionally moved by Erika’s willingness to help strangers on short notice.

I was moved as well. Who would have guessed, nine months ago, that Erika and Marty had begun to generate a moving-miracle?

Are you generating moving-miracles?

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MYFyXlDwN-fc35VXcwo-Fza_bVNWEong/view?usp=sharing

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa, "Worry" 31 March 2025

“Worry is a misuse of the imagination.”– Dan Zadra

Worry

On a rain sputtered Friday, Andrew and I sat across from each other to have a conversational lunch at Local Lime. And, it was clear that something was furrowing Andrew’s brow. The second indicator that something was bothering him was his deep sigh just before he dipped a crispy tortilla chip into the warm queso stationed between us.

“Something on your mind?” I asked, with a quick sideways glance at my friend.

Andrew popped the queso-dripping chip into his mouth, as if trying to warm the thoughts weighing him down. “I’ve been thinking about how much time I waste worrying about my wife and daughter. They’re on a girl’s trip with my wife’s cousin right now and I worry constantly about them. It’s silly, really. Both my wife and her cousin are smart and capable people. And now, talking with you about it, it just seems ridiculous for me to be consumed by this.”

I chuckled softly. “We all worry about small things sometimes. But you know, one of my favorite writers, Dan Zandra, once said, ‘Worry is a misuse of the imagination,’ It’s one of my worry-counterbalancing thoughts, whenever I begin to jump into an anxiety spiral.”

I watched as Andrew raised one of his thick, bushy eyebrows. “What do you mean?”

“Think about it,” I bounced back to him. Our imagination is powerful. It’s what helps us create stories, dreams, ideas and the future. But, when we focus on worry, we’re using that same power to create worst-case scenarios that haven’t, and likely won’t ever happen. Instead of using the gift of imagination to create cherished, hoped-for dreams, we’re stuck imagining problems.”

Andrew nodded slowly. “Like me, worrying about whether my wife and daughter are safe!” Then, a laugh escaped his once grimaced mouth. “What I should be worried about is my wife’s reaction if I don’t get the house back in order when they arrive home safely!” 

“Exactly,” I replied with a laugh. “It’s the difference between planting seeds of fear instead of trust. Worry can feel real, but it’s just imagination working against us.”

Andrew sighed again, in a mix of frustration and realization. “It’s funny, isn’t it? We spend so much time fearing the future, but when it arrives, it rarely looks the way we thought. How do you stop it, though? I mean, it’s not like anyone chooses to worry.”

At that, I smiled gently. “Maybe it’s not about stopping it, but redirecting it. Remember that quote from Dan Zandra? Next time you catch yourself worrying, use that as a catalyst to take that same scenario you’re imagining, the one where things go wrong, and flip it. Imagine what would happen if everything went right instead.”

Andrew mulled it over. “So, if I’m worried about work, I should picture myself handling things well instead of messing up?”

“Precisely,” I replied. “The more you practice, the more natural it becomes. You’ll train your imagination to work for you, not against you.”

Andrew seemed to breathe easier. “I never thought about it that way. I guess I’ve been letting my mind run wild in the wrong direction.”

“We all do sometimes. But, Dan’s catalyst can help you stop painting a dark sky so you can paint with colors for a sunrise instead. It’s a habit, and habits can change.”

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MYFyXlDwN-fc35VXcwo-Fza_bVNWEong/view?usp=sharing

Lynn Butterfield's Monday's Warm Cocoa, "The Next Right Step"

“We offer hope and transformation to young women by helping them take the next right step.” – Bekah Shaffer

The Next Right Step

“Saving Grace serves young women ages 18-25 who have aged out of foster care or are facing homelessness. We provide safe housing in a dorm-style setting and offer each young woman educational assistance, career guidance, coaching, counseling, and more,” Bekah started.

Then, she spoke of her own background.

“I grew up in a poverty household with a mother who neglected us and didn’t teach us how to take care of ourselves,” she explained. “One day someone from child services came and removed us from our home and that’s where I experienced foster care which ushered in the next step in my life.”

Then, “Becky” turned eighteen and she found herself “homeless” as the foster care system turned her out. It was another experience that indicated to her that she had “no people.” Yet, she took the next step with courage and went to work. And, since she had good grades she got into college where she began to meet new, different, people. Meeting a diverse group of people gave her the opportunity to really begin to learn how to live a successful life.

“That’s where I met my husband Kent,”   

Becky went on to say. “He taught me how to study and take care of myself more effectively. He taught me the value of a healthy relationship.”

After Kent and Becky were married she had a desire to help other young women who had endured a similar life experience. So, not long after their marriage the two hopeful collaborators created “Saving Grace Farm.”

At Saving Grace, young women between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five are given the opportunity to heal from childhood trauma, cultivate healthy relationships, and break the cycle of poverty that has greatly influenced their lives. Each woman receives support tailored to her unique needs, including safe and stable housing, professional counseling, medical care, life skills training, education, steady employment, and lifelong mentorship. Saving Grace doesn’t put a time limit on healing and forming healthy habits. They invest what it takes to empower each participating woman to alter the trajectory of her life, and create lasting generational change.

They’ve made it their mission to empower participants with the relationships, coaching, and opportunities that will help them to create lasting change without government funds. Perhaps Kent summed-up this approach best when he said, “they come to us without people and when they leave, they have people!”

Well, perhaps, but they have more than just people. They have the farm animals as well. And, it is the animals who also reinforce caring, engage their senses, and compose the steady, healing rhythm of the sacred acres of Grace Farms. After all, animals are the most forgiving creatures on earth.

The animals and people at Saving Grace demonstrate that we all make mistakes and the only thing really needed to move forward is to take the next right step, while being surrounded by good, caring people.

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I’m Lynn Butterfield, Real Estate & Lifestyle Expert and Television Host for American Dream TV in Northwest Arkansas. I’ve helped hundreds of Buyers and Sellers, as a real estate agent and Associate Broker with Coldwell Banker, to discover where and how they want to live and work; to achieve what I call Realesation™. That’s why I bring you American Dream TV, Both Sides of the Fence, About the Dish, Monday’s Warm Cocoa and Home by Design Magazine to stir your heart and mind. Contact me so I can join you along your own unique path of discovery.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MYFyXlDwN-fc35VXcwo-Fza_bVNWEong/view?usp=sharing